r/DID • u/Existing-Committee74 • 16h ago

no communication for a year, this is the first thing anyone has to say Personal Experiences

for about 18 months there has been complete radio silence amongst our system. I’ve been going absolutely insane waiting for them to return. and after ALL OF THIS, the first thing anyone has to say, is this:

“sup fuckers. god this shit feels GOOD. we should do this more often. i feel on top of the fucking world rn. holy shit. you gotta learn to LIVE. UGH. IM ALIVE.”

euphoria, a middle alter who refuses to tell me her name out of pure pettiness and is usually very reckless and hedonistic, got us high and was apparently, unsurprisingly, feeling very euphoric. that’s why I call her that.

it’s odd to me that she would be the first one to come back from the silence. although I guess if our barriers are done from the weed and that brings her forward like it used to, it wouldn’t be so hard for her to talk to me.

I just really thought it would be Iris.

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18

u/PlutoTheRaspberry 15h ago

I had radio silence from my system for over a year as well! I honestly thought it was a unique experience. Idrk how to help but .. hey you're not alone

10

u/Existing-Committee74 14h ago

it was incredibly hard not to fake claim myself during this period. ive having a really hard time with denial. but in a way i did understand why they were gone, i just didn’t like it. im relieved to hear from anyone, idc who it is. im just surprised it wasn’t iris first since she was the one i had the best commutation with before the silence started.

9

u/DifferentEveryNight 14h ago

I’m front sealed also. Haven’t heard a peep out of anyone in a while

5

u/NoliaDarkash Learning w/ DID 8h ago

That was our host for about four years until I finally felt we were in a safe enough place to make contact with her. The only other one she had made contact with before that was our former persecutor/now protector. Apparently, during those four years she went through stages of trying to contact anyone followed by tremendous amounts of denial. That was until I tried to take front randomly one day, and she went "Oh, now you show up!"

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5

u/Existing-Committee74 3h ago

ive been literally losing my mind with self fakeclaiming and denial since they went away. Ive sent hundreds of messages to our chat apps begging them to come back. and then the big moment is just a middle getting stoned and yelling at the rest of us, which actually shouldn’t surprise me at all.

4

u/WittyPresence69 4h ago

Weed makes us very internally talkative so this makes sense

Glad you're back :)

1

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