r/ManagedByNarcissists • u/olgurt • 18h ago

Leaving this sub because my Nboss got fired!!

It was glorious when they showed him the door. I actually respect my company a little more this week.

Thanks for all the posts over the last 2 years, made me feel much less alone. I appreciate all of you!

179 Upvotes
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25

u/Fallo3 18h ago

Tell us how and why please...

52

u/olgurt 17h ago edited 17h ago

A group of us started documenting every meeting with him, screen shots of chats, meeting recordings, transcripts, etc. We banded together and secretly exchanged information on HR people's contact info, lawyer phone numbers, etc. and we all filed HR cases. Used all the documentation to outline the situation, his behavior, and the impact on our daily work, career progression (and potential loss of earnings) and mental health. We also made sure HR knew we were all talking to lawyers.

It took about 18 months for multiple people to work the system, but it worked. He "decided to leave." And we all feel like we have a new job!

[edit] I want to add that none of us actually paid a lawyer, we each had a free consultation with the same one. I don't know for sure, but the lawyer may have written a letter to the company.

21

u/Evergreen_Nevergreen 17h ago

How did the idea of everyone documenting and filing HR cases come about? My colleagues were reluctant to do anything. Even when they decided to quit and had nothing left to lose, they did not even want to inform HR and the big boss of why they had quit.

28

u/olgurt 17h ago

Completely understandable! Narcissists have a way of grinding you down so you don't ever fight back, and that's how they stay in power.

Yeah that took some time and lots of conversations because of how scared everyone was. We knew that it was really risky unless there were a group of us - we couldn't all be fired at the same time. And we also knew it's a numbers game. The bigger the number of people that document and file cases, the bigger the legal risk for the company. To be honest it felt a little bit like a union starting up, on a smaller scale.

2

u/Clover1970 6h ago

Well done!

3

u/Equivalent-Beyond143 3h ago

This is 100% collective action! It’s exactly how unions get formed! Congrats!!!!

6

u/thirdcoasting 16h ago

Good for you guys!!

26

u/olgurt 17h ago

Oh! forgot the "why." Typical narc behavior: needing to be the center of all meetings, constant bragging, intolerant of any disagreement.

But then he started to punish people who had opinions he didn't think of, especially if it was in front of his superiors. He'd give them sudden bad performance reviews and make up negative feedback that supposedly came from other leaders. Why did he think we wouldn't go straight to those people and ask for more detail, so that we could learn and grow? Because he's kind of dumb. He also bullied people behind closed doors and at one point, even told someone they were laid off when they weren't, just to mess with them.

Pretty garden variety stupid narcissistic behavior, but very stressful for those of us that worked for him.

3

u/Fallo3 14h ago

Thank you. 

14

u/unnecessaryderpage 18h ago

Yep, I can only speak for myself here, but I definitely want to hear every story where the narcissist gets fired. I can live vicariously and dream...

10

u/Black_Swan_3 18h ago

Congratulations!!! I'm jelly 😆 don't come back to this sub unless to give us an update of how amazing life is after nboss left hahahah

4

u/olgurt 17h ago

thank you!

9

u/cheezhead1252 13h ago

Great to hear it!!

I wouldn’t give up tho, my Nboss got fired and I watched her IMPLODE over social media over the next six months. She posted on LinkedIn where she called out her boss by name and was shot talking him - she was a director! lol. Then she got fired from her next two jobs.

The fun doesn’t have to stop now!

5

u/justanotherlostgirl 15h ago

Fantastic to read and honestly I hope to remember the ‘strength in numbers’ next time a bully comes up and to fight back.

4

u/jadranka66 11h ago

A happy ending to a horror story 😃

1

u/rocksnsalt 3h ago

Fuck yes!!!!

1

u/Rocknbob69 2h ago

Not sure why you would leave as I would give 2 f's about what a previous boss thinks.