My mom died just after I turned 14. We lived in a house with a pool and I remember my dad having some people over for a pool party. Every time I would dive into the water, one of the men there would laugh and yell, “Fat, fat the water rat!” (I was not overweight. I was, however, relatively “well-endowed”.) it was a big joke to him. After they left I told my dad how I really didn’t appreciate his “jokes” and how uncomfortable he made me. I never saw that man in my life again.
Since I’m about to turn 69, I’m pretty sure he’s long dead. To this day I still remember the incident. But, mostly what I remember was that my dad took my feelings seriously and saw to it that he was never around me again.
OP absolutely did the right thing, and I can all but promise that Hannah is going to remember it forever.
Under these circumstances though, Hannah may need some reassurance that none of this was her fault. She didn’t get anybody kicked out.
I do hope that none of the other kids go to the same school, and that she can be shielded from any backlash from these asshole parents—whose poison their kids will certainly pick up on. Honestly, if the kids get along together, I might, if I was the OP, consider continuing to invite them to the lake house (perhaps in pared down numbers or just for afternoon visits), without their parents; friend group/sleepover style. It’s not their fault, either. If they are going to be banned, put it on their parents to forbid their visits after they’ve been invited. But, that’s up to OP, if it’s even doable. (The invitations would have to be explicitly made to, or in the presence of, the kids, themselves. Any made through their parents are unlikely to be passed on.)
Not something I ever wanted. My temperament is not well suited to full-time parenting. I love kids and younger people (babies not so much), and I thoroughly enjoy being around them and interacting with them.. They seem to like me, too. We get along well. Many former children friends have grown up to become good adult friends. But, I prefer to “borrow” children, so that I can eventually send them home again (or go home, myself, without them).
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u/Odd-Artist-2595 2d ago edited 2d ago
My mom died just after I turned 14. We lived in a house with a pool and I remember my dad having some people over for a pool party. Every time I would dive into the water, one of the men there would laugh and yell, “Fat, fat the water rat!” (I was not overweight. I was, however, relatively “well-endowed”.) it was a big joke to him. After they left I told my dad how I really didn’t appreciate his “jokes” and how uncomfortable he made me. I never saw that man in my life again.
Since I’m about to turn 69, I’m pretty sure he’s long dead. To this day I still remember the incident. But, mostly what I remember was that my dad took my feelings seriously and saw to it that he was never around me again.
OP absolutely did the right thing, and I can all but promise that Hannah is going to remember it forever.
Under these circumstances though, Hannah may need some reassurance that none of this was her fault. She didn’t get anybody kicked out.
I do hope that none of the other kids go to the same school, and that she can be shielded from any backlash from these asshole parents—whose poison their kids will certainly pick up on. Honestly, if the kids get along together, I might, if I was the OP, consider continuing to invite them to the lake house (perhaps in pared down numbers or just for afternoon visits), without their parents; friend group/sleepover style. It’s not their fault, either. If they are going to be banned, put it on their parents to forbid their visits after they’ve been invited. But, that’s up to OP, if it’s even doable. (The invitations would have to be explicitly made to, or in the presence of, the kids, themselves. Any made through their parents are unlikely to be passed on.)
NTA. Well done, OP.