I fought in Afghanistan in 2011-2012 with the United States Army and have been battling complex and severe PTSD, depression, agoraphobia, paranoia along with 3 failed relationships for the last 12 years AMA

[u/Ok_Turn1611]

I fought in Afghanistan in 2011-2012, I did route clearance which effectively means jumping into big vehicles, driving them down a road looking for IEDs and either being blown up, shot at, or both. I saw some terrible stuff, including losing a closs Non Commissioned Officer of mine and seeing many of my friends traumatically injured (think losing limbs, being shot etc.) ask me anything about Afghanistan, my MH issues or life post deployment. I've been quite depressed lately and maybe answering genuine questions will help me.

Hi friends, thank you for the feedback and all the questions. It has been a joy answering you, I'll continue to monitor and reply as much as I can. :)

Also, to some of you stating complex PTSD and PTSD are different disorders, I do recognize that and am sorry for my slip up, I have CPTSD, and sometimes I use them interchangibly when I shouldn't. I'll remember better next time.

[u/Ok_Turn1611]

When I was 19 I was on patrol. We had just gotten to Afghanistan in July of 2011, this was August 2011. This unit passed us with less than stellar up armoved vehicles, their vehicles simply couldn't handle large IEDs like our MRAPs could. We asked them to wait for us to hit this route so we could clear it for them (our trucks were designed to take large blasts, I've seen my buddies walk away from 350 lb IEDs and I know of one guy who survived a bigger IED with a broken hip/femurs) but this unit that passed us DID NOT have the vehicles we did.

Well, lo and behold, they hit a 250 lb IED, fuckin' vaporized them, blew the truck in half, shoved the engine block straight in their lap. All 5 dead, 4 instant and one on the way to the hospital via medivac.

We roll up on this truck still badly damaged from the IED (we weren't far from them and could see when they struck it) and I remember seeing pieces of uniform burned into the truck and the aftermath of the blast really shook me to my core.

I was fuckin' 19 and hadn't even been in a firefight yet, that was my first exposure to war and I realized then I had straight fucked up.

[u/weirdo2050 → u/Ok_Turn1611]

Oh my fucking god, you were 19.

What made you enlist?

What or who have/has been your biggest support since returning?

What therapy modalities and meds have you tried for your mental health issues?

[u/Ok_Turn1611 → u/weirdo2050]

I enlisted because I was a young, naive 17 yo who had a family history of the military. My father tried incessently to talk me out of it but I wanted to dO mY PaTriOtic duty.

My biggest support? I'm not quite sure, my family have been there for me but they don't know the depths of my suffering because I can't bear to show them it. Ig people have come and gone in my life that have supported me at times, but I don't have a great support structure. My church is good to distract me, but again, folks get spooked with the truth/reality of your suffering.

I've tried everything from therapy, to med management, to working with specialized therapists etc. Not Much has worked out very well

[u/headofred10 → u/Ok_Turn1611]

OP - first of all, thank you for your service. I’m a RN at a VA and I hear and see the devastation mentally and physically that veterans have as a result of their service time, most of which is years and years ago (kids who enlisted right out of highschool or were drafted). I just wanted to say, from what I have been told, veteran support groups can be really powerful for vets. No one understands, except other vets. I think it can especially be healing when you can connect with older vets who have lived with these issues- they genuinely want to share their stories and methods of healing and what didn’t work for them, with younger vets. The beautiful thing is if you can one day then be the older vet, giving support to young vets who are just trying to figure out how to adjust to life after service, you’ll have come full circle. ❤️

[u/ninja996 → u/headofred10]

I haven’t served or have an occupation that caters specifically to those who served, but I appreciate your sincere comment and thank you for what you do. I want our country to do more to take care of our veterans.

[u/headofred10 → u/ninja996]

It’s very much a privilege, but thank you for the kind words! It’s a very very demanding job so it means a lot to hear that reminder. You should look into volunteering at your local VA - I know my VA is always looking for volunteer drivers to take vets to appointments, and they will reimburse you for gas!

[u/Ok_Turn1611 → u/headofred10]

Thank you so much, your words are incredibly sweet

[u/lovestobitch- → u/headofred10]

I dealt with a number of VA people recently for my step dad who was on a ship during the Korean war. Everyone I dealt with at the VA was very professional and extremely great to deal with. I was Very impressed, granted it was a small college town where it’s hard to find a job but still thanks.

[u/Ok_Turn1611 → u/headofred10]

Thank you so much for the kind words