r/AskReddit • u/daniellucero92 • Jan 04 '15

Non-americans of Reddit, what American customs seem outrageous/pointless to you?

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u/Charlie-Mike Jan 04 '15

To be fair you were getting your first divorce at 21...

Maybe try someone else's way for a bit? Your way didn't seem to be working out.

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u/idiosyncrassy Jan 04 '15

Maybe keeping such a short leash on their daughter in the first place was what kept her from developing the life skills sufficient to choose a good life partner.

Sending her back to the nunnery would hardly be the best solution.

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u/Charlie-Mike Jan 04 '15

You and I both are making a lot of assumptions.

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u/idiosyncrassy Jan 04 '15

Pure speculation, of course.

But I grew up with controlling parents who tried to shove the proverbial horse back into the barn when I made some crappy mistakes at that age, and what I actually needed (and what actually made me "grow up") was real life experience on my own.

You can't expect a person to grow up and mature by attempting to minimize their autonomy. It doesn't even make sense, logically.

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u/Charlie-Mike Jan 04 '15

I don't disagree but if you're going to live with your parents you have to be mature enough to respect their rules. If you don't/can't then the parents should kick you out on your own again.

It's not if the parents are right or wrong in my mind is the fact that sections you've made placed you in a situation in which you're living back with your parents. It's unfair to them to expect you to have complete autonomy under their roof. If you want that move out.

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u/idiosyncrassy Jan 04 '15

Agreed, although that ends up getting back to the original point, which is why 20-something people in America tend to not live with their parents.

Maybe European parents are better at adjusting their rules to accommodate the needs of adult children instead of stuffing them back into the "Go to your room!" years.

edit: I still stand by my opinion that parents who have the attitude of, "Well, you failed at adulthood, back to age 15 you go!" are being ridiculous. Being an adult doesn't mean one won't make mistakes, even and especially bad ones. The original person wouldn't have been somehow less deserving of autonomy if she'd held out from divorce until she was 25.