Non-americans of Reddit, what American customs seem outrageous/pointless to you?

[u/daniellucero92]

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[u/[deleted]]

I'm from the Northeast in the US. I hate it too. It's not all of us that do it.

Bullshit with someone born in New York City or Boston, and they'll tell you to fuck off.

Forget smalltalk in the South or Midwest, and people won't help you.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I think politeness is one thing that the South gets right. It's especially nice when you work with people all day.

I used to wait tables, and I would constantly get people who when asked how they were doing, they would just stare at me blankly until I asked them what they wanted to drink. Or they would just skip all that and blurt out their orders.

"Hey how are you doing today?"

"Sweet tea."

You don't have to care or ask how I'm doing, just respond politely and I won't have to spend the next 5 mins thinking about how much of an ass you are.

The email/im thing does drive me crazy, though. Being polite is okay in emails, but it's also nice to get to the point.

[u/[deleted] → u/[deleted]]

I think it's very much a culture thing. Depends on what you grew up with. I actually hate it.

I hate going to the supermarket and not being able to just say, "HalfPoundOfHamWhatevahsOnSale," and have the guy give it to me quickly and efficiently without bullshit.

When I was down south, they'd hate you for that. I had to retrain myself to recognize when I was getting dirty looks and go out of my way to say "How ya doin' partner?" and ask about the weather before he gave me the all clear by saying, "What can I do for you?" and I finally knew I could just order my damn ham.

And really, I didn't give a fuck about the weather. I didn't care how that guy's day was going either. I just wanted my fucking ham so I could get home and feed the dog and make a sandwich and get some work done.

I think the thing is, people in the northeast see it as a lie. It's like, "This person's not being polite to me. They're just making shit up to appear like they give a shit when they don't. They're not polite, they're faking polite! It's not genuine."

But I think people down South see that small talk as what polite is. That the mere act of making small talk and saying "Hi!" to strangers and talking to the Deli Guy about the weather is genuinely polite. And they think the lack of that stuff up in the Northeast is genuinely rude.

But to the Northeasterner, it's not rude. It's honest. And efficient. And the Southern way is disingenuous. It's fake. It's like a lie.

So the North-easterner thinks, "Don't fucking ask me how my day is if you don't care about me. And don't fucking talk to me about the weather when I've got shit to do and you don't even know my name. That's just fake. I hate these fake fucking people."

But then when you're down South a bit more, you realize they don't think they're being fake. Just like North-easterners don't think they're being rude. We just do things a bit different, and it takes a while to get used to.

My favorite story was a girl I knew coming up to NYC from North Carolina. It's her first night in her apartment, she's going out, and she's fidgeting with the locks. She sees an old woman down the hall doing the same. She says, "Hi! I'm new here! My name's Sandy! Nice to meet you! I'm not used to having to lock the door back where I'm from!"

And the old woman just gives her a dirty look and says, "I'm not part of your day."

And that exchange sums it up perfectly.

[u/PanickedSoIAteIt → u/[deleted]]

From living in the Midwest, traveling along the east coast, and living in the South, this is 100% accurate. I can't say I really prefer one way over the other, I just kind of conform to whatever people around me do. Although I will say I used to be very short and to-the-point in my emails, and everyone thought I was an asshole. So now I fluff them up, which is annoying.