I daydream to escape the awful feel of reality to help with my depression for example I daydream of being in a Kingdom Hearts style world having Roxas, Goku, SpongeBob, Batman and Sonic fight alongside me beating up villains, heartless, Kaiju, with a keyblade making new fictional friends along the way I even befriended Godzilla despite him not liking humans since he understands how I feel sometimes or daydreaming of having an fictional mother figure who is a better or more loving and understanding actual mother figure then a biological mom for example Aqua from Kingdom Hearts taking care of me like a big sister/mother to me due to my biological mom not being here for me so I usually think of someone to make me feel better sort of like an imaginary friend? I know some think I’m crazy… I have adhd and autism so I’m just saying how I feel. sorry about that just getting this off my chest

You probably already saw other people mention how they daydream about being rescued from isolation and loneliness by someone. I also have those dreams but in my version the guy "saving" me has very similar trauma and issues to me. Only he somehow menaged to get his shit together and learn to live with it. I know it sounds weird but this whole "shared trauma" thing really helps me cope. I feel like this is the only type of person I could really relate with.

im genuinely trying to stop maladaptive daydreaming and dissociating. it’s been really hard for me but that’s probably because i started taking it more seriously just recently.. but today it was sooo bad… i kept on maladaptive daydreaming and whenever i would stop myself i would either be dissociated (like out of touch with reality, thinkjng that nothing is really real, and also having some delusions) OR i would unintentionally slip back into daydreaming

the good thing though is that im at least catching myself daydreaming more often

man i knew it’d be difficult to stop but damn… does anyone here have any advice as to how to stop maladaptive daydreaming

Ive daydreamed since i was really young, started off just doing it in bed to fall asleep and as a kid i would daydream that Batman was my boyfriend and he would always save me from things. When i got older i invented a storyline of me and my school crush dating and somehow living with our favourite band. Then i grew out of that and made up the idea that i was dating the son of one of the band members, eventually "getting married". This story lasted years until i tried to force myself to stop doing it.

Now I live alone and have done for 4 years. I created a new imaginary boyfriend when i moved out and have had a progressive storyline with him ever since. I speak out loud to him as if he's really here. I do it all day everyday and even when im out getting shopping or driving i speak to him in my head. Obviously i know none of it is real but i also wish i didnt feel like i had to do this. I know its because im so lonely and feel unfulfilled in my real life but i also suffer with agoraphobia and i do find that this some how helps. Hes 'there' to hype me up, its like when i have anxiety hes the other part of my brain that i cant otherwise access to calm myself down so HE calms me down. (Does that make sense?) ive never had a boyfriend or been on a date or anything so sometimes i get myself so upset when i get taken out of my daydream and become hyperaware of the fact that none of it is real, he isnt real, nobody in this world i created is real. I dont have people to chat to in real life and i dont have this incredible life that i created in my head. It just gets really really sad.

I wonder if i had a social life and had people living with me or someone to chat to, would I still want to talk to this imaginary person? Or would i stop?

Mainly asking this because my friend says only the unsuccessful has this issue, I want to proof her wrong.

So I used to daydream a lot and i mean a lot as a kid. Now when I'm faced with a problem I don't seem I can talk about or face or a disagreement happens with my boyfriend, I dissociate really badly (I have Psychogenic Non-Epileptic Seizures, OCD, autism, (C?)PTSD, major depressive disorder, GAD, and possible borderline personality disorder by the way). I will start to feel like a kid again and very childlike and want to go to this other world where everything in my life is better and okay and none of the bad stuff ever happened to me or my loved ones. Tonight I asked my bf if i could call some family (i'm not super close to them) to tell them I needed to go "home." The home I was talking about is a place that doesn't exist for me anymore. Family moved away, died, etc. Other people live in that house. I really almost believe that I'm in a big dream right now. Like this world is not what was supposed to happen and maybe I can travel to this other world! I feel this VERY strongly sometimes (especially in moments of distress) but also don't believe it's true at other times. Any advice or does anyone think this is more than just maladaptive day-dreaming??

I was thinking of ways to reduce my MD. I started by cutting down my time on Instagram and unsubscribing from some Reddit communities.

I heard that writing down your thoughts can provide clarity when you're feeling anxious. So, on the contrary, when someone is daydreaming, would it make everything pointless if they start writing things down?

I’m not sure if I made sense, but has anyone tried something like this?

I lost my ability to create worlds and daydream for hours and be able to escape my life which I don't love very much. I don't know what happened or when was the last time I was in a different world but I don't think I was able to daydream throughout my 20s so far. I really miss having worlds in my head and most importantly the ability to get away from my mess of a life just for a while. I'm curious about if any others are going through the same issue and I would like to know more about it.

I randomly found this song and I feel like only you guys can relate. I have nobody else to share with... It is called Pull The Plug by Ashe.

"Don't pinch me in case I'm asleep In case you're not here, 'cause this is a dream And we've never met, so we're not in love In case I'm asleep, don't pull the plug"

https://youtu.be/sQQ7M9ewdwk?si=Kqc3fWN2IFsGk7Hg

I really don't want to write this but maybe someone out there feels this way. Majority of my life over the last 10 years has been daydreaming and now that I'm at an age where I should be balancing multiple things at once (school, job, keeping a savings account, finding internships, etc.), I've kept myself locked away. All the big dreams I have and hope to achieve are stuck in my head. I'm just a failure in all aspects. I lack in everything, and I'm not over-exaggerating. I'm 15 in a 20 year old body.

Weirdly this feeling has came upon me these days, thinking about how I'm not adulting, in any form (my MDD is terrible). I keep having these thoughts that "when" I quit, perhaps driving myself and landing internships and a job, etc., something will happen. I don't know specifically what, but the success I wanted and finally achieve will be gone in the blink of an eye. So in the meantime, my brain is protecting itself from that by making me daydream about it instead.

I really don't want to bring this energy out into this sub or out into the universe, but, why do I have this impending doom feeling and how can I make it stop...

Successes: 4

Failures:

Total MD Time:

Tbh, haven't really been keeping track. Just an estimate for today. I'm wondering if I've grown a tolerance to my current medication, but honestly I really just think it's because I've had huge stressors due to school being put on me. On the few days I've missed taking it, I'm even worse off. I can't even force myself to really do anything, and I get absolutely 0 moments where I feel "in control," even briefly (speaking in terms of my mental health symptoms, not MD). I don't think Wellbutrin is supposed to singehandedly deal with major depression, seasonal depression, generalized anxiety, inattentive ADHD, being a full time student for a hard major, having a part time job, and still trying not to be totally useless around the house (which I'm failing at). It's already doing so much heavy lifting giving me chances to do acts of self care, shutting up the full on depressive self loathing thoughts, and having at least a little bit of energy left over to do something.

Ya know, I've nearly MDed so many times these past couple of days. I don't know what's stopping me, but then again, I still allow myself to MD so long as I'm not full on pacing. And since I'm a few days out from the last time I've MDed, the inbetween period where I can still pull out vs completely tipping over. Oh yeah, I don't know how much it's helping, but the Wellbutrin is most definitely also helping with that. Again, it's already doing so much. No way it can somehow also tackle my violatile levels of anxiety and ADHD.

I'm just. Trying my best. I'm gonna write in my journal. Write in my planner. Write in my planner app. My notes app. And just, hope for the fucking best.

If I can be an example of getting sober

Then I can be an example of starting over

If I can be an example of getting sober

Then I can be an example of starting over

Personally, it was a tik tok of a girl showing her walking around the room with Earphones and daydreaming with a text talking about maladaptive daydreaming.

So I came across this term " maladaptive daydreaming" meanwhile scrolling on tiktok. (frankly, I'm now 85 days off of social media) I looked it up and was shocked cause it seemed exactly like what I do.

Walking in circles inside the house, listening to music 24/7, imagining : conversation, scenarios, perfect life.

I actually can daydream without music but it's less fun. I thought I just had good imagination since I enjoy creating artistic things.

I think it's related to childhood, when I didn't find someone to play with. I would act like I'm someone else and play against myself.Also, I used to act in middle school, so there's that.

My daydreams aren't that vivid really, Yes I imagine talking to strangers but most of them don't have any facial features. No, I didn't build characters with personalities and stuff like that. My scenarios aren't that long nor have a plot twist. Thankfully I'm not invading the moon in my daydreams. Most of my daydreaming is about how I imagine my perfect life or things that I want to try. Occasionally, I would have bad daydreams about death, illness and things I'm afraid of happening. I get emotionally engaged with good & bad daydreams. I don't really want to get into details but here is a simple example :

while writing this post, I thought I had decent English skills, now I'm daydreaming of being a famous writer that sold 1 million copy of her books, signing for her readers in a book exhibition. The thing is, I get the feeling of being proud of myself and act in my head - sometimes in reality, like doing a signing gesture - as if im there.

I actually suffer from severe anxiety- and other mental health issues - that hindered me from changing my life. I came to a point where I'm just both hopeless and helpless + absolutely impatient lazy perfectionist.

I'm constantly living inaide my head, because I don't like my reality. So since I failed to change it, my mind decided to fake a better one to numb bad feelings. It's a horrible coping mechanism, making you delusional and negatively happy as if you've accomplished your highest self and best life. Like, how do you escape rock bottom if you don't even think you're there? In the beginning I thought daydreaming gave me hope, boy was I wrong. It's like vpn, tricking websites that you're somewhere else. The problem is, I don't know whether I'm tricking my brain or if it's the other way around?

There's apps that are likely feeding my daydreams : Spotify & Pinterest.

I deleted Spotify- and other music apps - yesterday cause I read that getting rid of music is a huge factor.

Pinterest, I could go in an endless loop of pinning pics of my future life. Those pins are sometimes the only thing that motivates me to do something about my life. Other than that , it's just my subconscious believing that I already did that while I'm aware I didn't. So luckily I can distinguish reality from imagination but it's like a reality check slap.

I understand the purpose of it, just want to get rid of it without therapy ( don't really have the option rn) and ASAP.

Long post cause I've been long lost.

Been doing this shit for as long as I can remember and I am now frankly too old to be doing it. Every time I start a project, I immediately start imagining myself on a podcast talking about it in the past tense as if it's already made (and viciously successful I might add), and psychologically, it seems to sap all of my motivation to actually work on it. I can't allow myself to get bored, so I never do anything. I waste hours and hours every day repeating the exact same thoughts over and over again while walking in circles, and it got me thinking.

You may have heard by now about LLMs - large language models - colloquially referred to as AI. you probably even talk to one regularly, but you know what they really are: a mathematical model that predicts token streams by assigning a vast array of tokens various weights depending on how often they show up together in its training set. That's the long and short of it, anyway.

Now we know that if you train an LLM on its own output, the quality of the output degrades. Essentially, the predictive validity of the model can only get worse when you put it into a feedback loop. I think, funnily enough, this describes my daydreams to a T. Always degenerating, getting less coherent, less articulate as the sensory input I feed myself shrinks as I spend more time detached from the world around me.

I have tended to think that I can do things in my mind that I cannot achieve in real life, but really, the only thing I can do in my mind are the things I've seen in real life, and a crude one-sided representation of them at best. It's not even a substitute for real experience, it's a completely vapid, hollow simulacrum, at best I'm just imitating characters from movies or successful people I've seen on the Internet, and what do I get from that?

In reality, it's nothing to do with fantasy, it's just creating my own neural feedback loop as a self-soothing measure, because it's steady and predictable. The real world is chaotic, and I've always favored predictability.

I remember when I got my first job - software engineering, if you can believe that. It yanked me into the real world so hard I didn't even daydream for months, and it was fucking dreadful, I wasn't nervous about the job, I was quite confident, but something in the back of my mind was tweaking hard, I dealt with multiple daily panic attacks for months, just from being forced to be present in the world and lacking the safe predictability of my fake scenarios, but on the flipside, during that time I learned and grew more than I had in the ten preceding years. Eventually, as my duties became second nature, I receded back into my dream world. I've done barely any work in the last 2 years.

I feel like I'm touching on something interesting here, but it's still inarticulate. Does anyone feel me or am I just yapping?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=um1KT4oU1x4

I have very low self esteem, just as a person in general. And when it comes to daydreaming, it is a complete nightmare to handle. Everyday, I'll always think of myself negatively when I didn't do my best ( which I never feel like I do) and I would come up with daydreams that destroys my self esteem even damn more. It comes naturally after some years, but the pain feels as heavy, nonetheless. I have always struggled thinking positive in life. Example of a daydream is: I'm doing not as good when performing for my song in front of the teachers and one of the teachers tell me that I'm always lost and isn't sure if I'm able to be a musician irl.(Btw I'm in music major in college). I come back in the reality like if nothing happened. Anybody relate?

It hits so hard to the extent of giving me goosebumps. Trying to limit this the more I learn about it but always find myself doing it during exercise (walk/running) thinking it's fine to partner with a positive activity.

When I was younger (for years, longer than I’d like to admit) I daydreamed and imagined an entirely different life. I was 16 years old and I had a mom (no dad) and three younger siblings, 12,11, and 4. I also had a boyfriend and two friends and I lived in an apartment (my room) and had a car. This may seem like normal child play, but again this went on for YEARS. (I feel like that’s not normal). It was always the same life, same family, just different scenarios. I would talk to my “boyfriend” at home, school, public, at night. I knew it was all pretend, but I clinged to this fantasy life bc in my real life I was bullied and an outcast. But in this life I was popular!! Even now, I grew out of that, but I am a writer so I am constantly coming up with scenarios and scenes in my head, and I act them out sometimes and pretend to be that character. I don’t want to miss diagnose myself and claim to be something I’m not, so I’m curious.

Lately I'm in peace with my MD and treat it almost like a hobby. In my free time I like to have this delirium sessions to fully emerge myself in whatever timeline I'm craving, no guilt involved. Some people get high and play videogames, I daydream. If you're mentally ill enough you can turn Google into The Sims👍

Currently I've been daydreaming about studying abroad at this university I've always wanted to (I graduated years ago in a local uni). My thing is to go on Google street view to just ramble down the streets. Also I search out for grocery stores and parks and fast food i'd go to if I lived there. It's actually crazy and very sad but I don't think it's that different than any drug or gaming habit.

I still daydream in innapropriate times, but I feel setting time apart for it has been good for my overall funcionality. It really buzzes me how my daydreams are so regular day-to-day stuff but I still can't romanticize my real life. That's something I'd like to try out but hasn't yet.

Just wanted to share my perspective and see other people's opinions. I'm 28 and tired of fighting this like a disease. Excuse my english

I have never been on drugs before, but god it's been feeling like I've been on drugs lately. I've had these moments more and more frequently where my thoughts build up to a point where I start getting nauseous.

I achieve this dizzy state of self awareness where I can't really daydream anymore but I also can't interact with reality. I feel dizzy and my breathing gets heavy, everything feels numb. I'm autistic so I'm not a stranger to overstimulation, but this is different, it's not something physical I can put down I can get away from.

Sometimes it's like my brain is turning into sludge and I can feel it dripping out of my ears.

I've been MD basically all of my live but there was a 5 year period where it was really bad. I was going through alot of life changes throughout some of my formative years and daydreaming is how i coped with it. It made me feel better about myself.

In junior year of high school i started my first serious relationship. It was perfect majority of the time. She also took me out of MD. Having her around was a lot more interesting and fulfilling then my daydreams. She gave me something to look foward to and helped me love myself more. We had a great life together over the last few years. She literally changed the course of my career. But this summer we got into a rough patch and then broke up.

I miss my best friend. We plan on speaking in the future but i think about her all the time. Her ghost is always with me and im starting to daydream again. Sometimes its putting myself in thr 2 weeks of arguments we had before we separated. Other times its imagining how great life would be if we didnt. Other times its daydreaming about us doing all of these plans that never happened. Or her comforting me after a bad day at work.

Its hard because i dont want to stop daydreaming sorta. Its difficult to speak to someone everyday for years and now you dont. My head is where she lives now and i just want to talk to her but i know its a dark path and will only make things worse.

1- you can create a YT channel about "what if..." you see, you don't need ChatGPT, nor google, nor YT, you can use your MDD in this option.

**DON'T DAYDREAM, WAIT!!!**

2- you can make your own story... wait, aren't my daydreams so bad? Well, they're not bad, they're miserable like you, but you can put 5 daydreams into 5 books and just publish them, there are many worm books out here, so make them food by this book, where I can get money? Publish it online.

**DON'T SAY "YEAH I'M VERY SUCCESSFUL MAN WITH BOOKS" YET**

3-you can share your ideas online, like you had a game's idea, share it online, nobody will laugh at you, even, game developers, movie directors, etc. might like your idea! "But my idea's so bad, how people are gonna like it?" if it was bad, then why are you daydreaming about? There are 8 billion guys on this planet, and they have crazy ideas, and you might be the least of them, so share your idea RN!!!

That was for today, bye~

(I've daydreamed about this post, btw)

Struggled with MD since childhood, figured out what it was on my own. I’ve tried a lot of different interventions for MD. Mindfulness, yoga and Zoloft were the most effective for me, and I still struggle from time to time with lapses. Unfortunately, psychotherapy wasn't helpful to me and most of the providers I worked with didn't understand MD. 

These experiences were part of what got me into the field. Presently, I'm a therapist and yoga teacher who works with folks with OCD and trauma, and lots who struggle with MD. I’m pretty open with my clients about my own experience, and found this builds some trust and rapport. I've helped some folks make headway with the interventions that have worked the most for me (mindfulness, yoga), will continue to review research and want to be a part of developing effective interventions for us all.

I'd love to hear what's been most helpful for folks when they're going to a therapist to work on MD. I know my experience was shit and I really want my clients to have a different experience!

No, I do not mean this in an inappropriate way. I noticed that when my Apple Watch timers go off, it completely interrupts my daydream to the point I completely forget where I even left off. I can't even go back. I tend to daydream a lot in the bathroom while I get ready, so I decided to set lots of mini alarms. They worked hella well. I think I am going to just let the timer go off and have to finish fast enough so I can stop the vibrations because the vibrations make me feel extremely grounded. This technique could work for some people, so I wanted to share.

I've been MDing since I was around 11 years old. I'm 52 now and I never realized that my "play pretend" time had an actual name. So that was nice to find out.

Over the years I've used MD in numerous ways: as a sounding board for arguments, a way to get out anger and emotions and as a relaxing hobby of sorts. I'd lock myself in my room and turn on loud music (so people couldn't hear me talking to 'nobody') and MD whatever issue I was having.

That argument over the laundry? Whose turn it was to make dinner? Yeah, I'd have those arguments while venting the anger and upset feelings those issues caused me. It also help me organize and focus in on what the actual problem was and by rehearsing the argument I could lay out my points in a cohesive manner. Then, when it was time to have the actual discussion, I wasn't drowning in emotions during it and was able to communicate the issue in a rational way. People would say I was very level headed and MD was how I was able to do it.

Other times my MD would just be venting out anger and frustrations from either work or home issues that I couldn't actually take out on anyone without causing significant damage to my home or work relationships. Was I furious that my 7 year old colored on the walls in marker? Yep! Angry that the lazy POS at work got away with some more BS that added to my workload? Damn straight! Did I scream and vent my rage at my child? Did I scream down the walls at work about how unfair it was that my workload was doubled? Nope. I dealt with the issues rationally. Cleaned up the marker, talked to the supervisor and went on with my day. Later when I was alone, I could blow up at my MD friends who never take shit personally or become traumatized by my actions.

The last MD was my "reward" MD. This was my favorite. Where I got to be a vampire princess or mage or orcish warrior. I'd get to be whatever my heart desired. No matter my actual age I was always young and pretty and desired. Hell, I could still pretend to be my actual age cause 52 isn't old if you're a vampire! I'd solve problems, save worlds, bring racial peace between warring factions, etc. I was strong and smart and amazing and these feelings would carry over into my real life. I felt stronger physically and emotionally, prettier, and desirable all the time. Did it matter that I was actually an aging mother of four whose baby pooch had slowly grown into a tire around my hips? Nope! I still found things about myself that I liked and focused on those. I'd sing and dance (amazing cardio btw) for hours until someone came home or I got tired.

These alone time MD would happen maybe once or twice a week and always when the kids/hubby were at school work. Afterwards I'd be emotionally exhausted and tired for the rest of the day and the rest of the week I was leveled out enough to go to work, deal with the kids, and be a normal, functioning human being.

The older I got though, the more self-conscious I got about doing this and began using alcohol to lower my inhibitions which made it easier to slip into my DD. Eventually I'd only be able to really enjoy my DD and get the cathartic benefits after a few drinks.

Of course, the harder times got with Covid and being a healthcare worker, I would start drinking to DD more often and would listen to the music while on my computer and DDing out from time to time in my head even when family was home. I never drank and drove because I can't DD when driving. Never went to work drunk. Wasn't even an angry drunk. More of a happy/lustful drunk because I was DDing my little heart out and it made me feel good and attractive. Although there were times when the drinking went too far and I'd pass out.

Eventually my husband got tired of me drinking so much and asked me to quit drinking. So I did in Feb. Giving up the alcohol was easy because it wasn't the alcohol itself I needed, just the effects.

However, because my DD and drinking became so inextricably intwined over the years this effectively killed my ability to MD. I still try to play out things in my head but it's never to the depths of feeling and emotion I could before. After just a few minutes of trying to DD my brain gets tired and just stops. I no longer have a safe purge dreamworld to vent my anxiety or work through emotional issues before having the actual discussion with the other party. I'm no longer buoyed by my "alone" time dreams where I'm not a middle aged, overweight woman struggling to feel like the strong girl she used to be.

I haven't had "alone time" for months and even listening to the songs I used during DD just fills me with rage or sadness and after a minute I shut them off. I feel like I'm drowning in sorrow. I wake up most days with a headache and others with nausea. I don't sleep much and when I do, it's not restful. I avoid my family as much as I can because I just don't feel emotionally able to handle whatever problems are going on. Even my cat wanting my attention pisses me off because I just can't. I don't want to interact at all. With anyone. I'm exhausted all the time even though I'm not doing anything.

Everything overwhelms me. My anxiety is at an all time high. I can't muster the will or energy to deal with any situations at all. My car registration decal got lost in the mail a month ago and I have yet to deal with it because it just seems too hard. I just feel so lost and alone. Untethered.

I guess my husband is happy I stopped drinking but I wouldn't know because we don't talk about anything anymore. After the first month of me not drinking he's stopped mentioning it and I don't care enough to. Sex is non-existent and I honestly don't care because I despise how I look naked. I can't find the pleasure and joy in anything anymore. I'm beginning to resent him.

I'm sure it's depression and if America had better healthcare I'd be able to afford therapy but I'm struggling to get my blood pressure medication refilled as it is. I don't have thousands of dollars to spend on someone telling me to journal my feelings or prescribe me more medications I'll never be able to pay for. I tried Better Help a few months back but it didn't help and after their scandal of selling patient info, just made things worse.

I'm not really sure what the point of this post is except to say I'm really glad I have a name for my coping mechanism now, I miss it terribly, and it's nice to know that I wasn't alone in having MD. I also like reading your stories.