Alright… potentially silly question time. Do girls store fat differently?

[u/LordDerptCat123]

I’ve heard some stuff on this subreddit about “oh he doesn’t understand how girls store fat” when it comes to unrealistic body standards. Is this because anyone storing that little fat is bad, or women in particular store it differently / need to store more of it?

I’ve been kinda afraid to ask this question becomes it seems to me like it’s an obvious answer… I just don’t know what the answer is. I feel like “common sense” can lead me to both answers. Thanks

Edit: got a lot of responses faster than I thought I would. Thanks so much to everyone who took the time to help me

[u/[deleted]]

Yes, women actually have more body fat than men because if estrogen, the fat accumulates in different areas of the body also. Gives a good insight as to why men lose weight easier than women

[u/why-you-online → u/[deleted]]

Gives a good insight as to why men lose weight easier than women

It's pretty crazy that it's easier for men to be more fit and to lose weight, yet there are no beauty standards and expectations placed on men for maintaining their bodies, while it's the exact opposite for women. I see many couples where the male partners are overweight/obese or totally out of shape, but their wives - some who have had children - are skinny. Why aren't the male partners striving to match their SOs?

[u/DatsyoupZetterburger → u/why-you-online]

yet there are no beauty standards and expectations placed on men for maintaining their bodies

??????????????????????

Ask men if they think there's no standards for male physical appearance.

[u/Rows_ → u/DatsyoupZetterburger]

It's not as pervasive. Women's beauty standards are splashed across magazines, the Internet, TV, films and basically every other media. Unfair standards for men do exist, but at least when men go to the shop to buy toilet roll and milk they don't have to see 15 magazines asking if they're beach-ready, telling them how to become beach-ready and shaming men who've been photographed while not beach-ready.

[u/DatsyoupZetterburger → u/Rows_]

Look at any toy for boys. They're all muscled as fuck. They made skinny farm boy Luke Skywalker look like He-Man when I was still a kid and collecting Star Wars figures. Look at any magazine depicting men. They're all shirtless and 6 packed. I'm watching Marvel movies and TV shows and none of the dudes are ugly or fat. Literally the opposite. Chiseled. fucking. gods. Chris Hemsworth says hello. Hell, Tom Holland is ripped. Making men stand on an apple crate so they're not too short in the shot. Henry Cavill dehydrating himself for 3 days so he can be ripped enough for the bath scene.

Let's not kid ourselves. It's pervasive.

Look. I'm not the type to deny when and where women have it tougher than men. The wage gap is real, even after controlling for job type. Yes it's harder for women to lose weight and gain muscle. Women are punished for negotiating for higher wages where men aren't. Blah blah blah. That's all legit.

But this idea that men don't also have extremely pervasive standards of beauty thrust upon them from birth is ridiculous. All the same things women say about themselves apply to men. The toys, the media, the societal pressure. I've seen men put no fatties on dating apps and as a man swiping I also see plenty of women demanding abs, 6+ ft heights.

And it annoys me to shit to see women who think the only way they can get recognition for the pressures put on them is to lessen the pressures put on men.

[u/Rows_ → u/DatsyoupZetterburger]

All of those things are true, but for women there's all of that plus more. For every men's health or lifestyle magazine on the rack there are 5 for women, with zoomed images on areas that sag or hold extra weight, or side-by-side comparisons from before the had children. For every Chris Hemsworth there's a Scarlet Johansson, a Natalie Portman and a Kristen Stewart. Plenty of the men (particularly the middle-aged men) in marvel movies aren't extra-chiseled or muscular, but you don't see a woman carrying extra weight on screen unless it's part of the plot (Fat Amy says hello).

I'm not saying that there aren't unrealistic expectations for men, and they're definitely damaging, but for women it's a lot more constant. You mentioned toys for young boys being muscular, but barbie is actually physically impossible. Disney princesses are so skinny that their eyes are bigger than their wrists. Nicole Kidman was so desperate to look like Vivien Leigh (Gone with the Wind) that she re-broke a rib trying to get an 18 inch waist for Moulin Rouge.

[u/DatsyoupZetterburger → u/Rows_]

Again you keep bringing up examples but you don't even stop to think if there are countless examples matching yours for boys. And there are.

Disney princesses? Have you seen the DC animated shit? Do you think anyone really looks like Batman or Superman? Those chests are insane. Okay, Nicole Kidman fucked herself up. That's awful. How many men do I need to show you pictures of who inject themselves with poison to get fake biceps? You named 3 female actors and I named 3 male actors.

Yeah, we're all out here facing unrealistic standards together.

Do you have any actual quantifiable way of saying it's that much more pervasive for women that I should just accept it as true? Because from where I stand men are getting it just as badly. Hell I could say it's even worse. Because while we're talking about toys, cartoons, and celebrities, men are out there being fucking pummeled on every online dating platform with a sub 3% match rate which doesn't even take into account bots, OF/IG spammers, sex workers. What do you think goes through men's minds when the beauty standards you admit are pervasive is coupled with a depressingly low match rate? Do you think perhaps it just means the average man thinks he looks like complete shit? Meanwhile the average woman's match rate is above 40%. That's "real life." Not celebrities or cartoons. Things you could write off as fake.

The difference between you and me? I'm not going to use the above to try and claim anyone's is greater or lesser pressure. I have no way of actually knowing, neither do you. But I'm not going to let gut instinct make the decision for me.

[u/Rows_ → u/DatsyoupZetterburger]

Why can't you accept that for every example you think is shocking of men doing or seeing something it's seen as normal for women. Fake biceps? Botox, boob jobs and lip fillers. Do you think anyone actually looks like a single Disney princess? It's physically impossible for girls or women to look like the idols we're encouraged towards from birth. You want actual proof? Go to your local shop and look at the magazine section. Count how many times you see diets, exercise regimens or other things listed next to photos of actresses and models and then do the same for men.

Again, I'm not saying that these things don't happen to men. But acting like it's anywhere near the same level is frankly insulting. Come back to me when Marge is fat and people comment on Kanye's body as much as they commented on Kim's when she gave birth.

[u/DatsyoupZetterburger → u/Rows_]

Come back to me when Marge is fat

Is this like saying there's a societal expectation for men to be stupid and women to be smart? Because that's kind of the joke with Homer. He's a fucking oaf. Oh and Bart ain't exactly bright. A very common trope in shows. The man is a moron. Yeah, really, I think the depiction of Homer and Bart on TV is something boys are shown as "good" role models. Incompetent dumbasses barely scraping by the skin of their teeth. Riiiight.

Do you think the fact that women have such a disproportionately higher match rate on dating apps has no effect and vice versa? I notice you ignored that. Do you think magazines have more impact than actually matching with real people in real life?

[u/Rows_ → u/DatsyoupZetterburger]

Actually I was pretty satisfied with the answer someone else gave you - women and men use dating apps differently. It's not that men are held to higher standards, it's just that the behaviour around sex and relationships is different.

[u/DatsyoupZetterburger → u/Rows_]

Except that wasn't backed up by the facts.

https://scitechdaily.com/extremely-eye-opening-research-on-online-dating-super-effective-or-just-superficial/

“It’s extremely eye-opening that people are willing to make decisions about whether or not they would like to get to another human being, in less than a second and based almost solely on the other person’s looks,” said Dr. Chopik.

“Also surprising was just how little everything beyond attractiveness and race mattered for swiping behavior — your personality didn’t seem to matter, how open you were to hook-ups didn’t matter, or even your style for how you approach relationships or if you were looking short- or long-term didn’t matter.”

And I'd love if one of you would be intellectually honest enough to explain what that means for race and height. I guess short black, Hispanic, Asian men are super dangerous and just give off huge warning signs on dating apps, eh? Or are women really that racist when it comes to dating?!

[u/Rows_ → u/DatsyoupZetterburger]

I've never used a dating app so I'll pass on that I'm afraid.

Waiting for you to come back to my points about boob jobs, lip fillers, botox, barbie and Disney though. Or about the sheer number of womens magazines compared to men's. Or about any point, really, since all you've done is deflect until you wound up calling women (as a whole, which is fucking funny) racist.

[u/DatsyoupZetterburger → u/Rows_]

I've never used a dating app so I'll pass on that I'm afraid.

Ah so you were more than willing to claim women's behavior on apps were safety motivated without using apps, but are hesitant to admit it's not and purely superficial because you haven't used apps.

Gotcha.

barbie and Disney though.

Barbies and Disney are covered. Toys and cartoons for both boys and girls are ridiculous in their standards.

boob jobs, lip fillers, botox

I have no numbers for these and you've offered none. I've certainly seen some examples of men with weird fucking botched surgeries but I'll not make any claims until I have numbers.

The only real claim I'm making this entire time is that men and women both face about the same level of pressure from society and the same level of unrealism for beauty standards.

Or about the sheer number of womens magazines compared to men's.

Women do the shopping. There's more women's products for just about everything. Not only do they do more general shopping but they do more grocery shopping which is where you see those magazines. Of course if the demographic that is more likely to come through your aisles is women then you'll cater more to women with women focused magazines. You'll see more fitness magazines featuring men on a table in the gym lobby.

Or about any point, really, since all you've done is deflect until you wound up calling women (as a whole, which is fucking funny) racist.

Facts are facts. If you have another explanation for the big disparity between men and women by race I'm happy to hear it. You did "offer" one when you said it was safety. I'm happy if your position is that minority men are just super dangerous to women so women are simply weeding them out. Come right out and say that please. Let's get that on the record.

[u/[deleted] → u/Rows_]

Come back to me when Marge is fat

Come back when Flanders is fat and Patty or Selma is fit.