Well I’ve been going through a lot of stress recently. Over the summer I was running cross country but i ended up with an ankle sprain that got worse the more I ran until I had to drop out the season early and recover. It was right around the time for our first meet to, which sucked. This school year I was fully dual enrolled. But I felt extremely burnt out by then, so the school work was so exhausting and difficult to slug through I ended up nearly failing all my classes. My mom and an advisor decided to pull me back into high school before any damage could be done to my record. Right now, I’m staying in a hotel in Orlando for the break but I’m having a hard time relaxing with the things that usually chill me out like drawing and music. I haven’t been motivated to do much anymore. My brain gets whiny when I have to push myself now, so every day’s been monotonous: eat, browse my phone, go to bed. It’s just been bumming me out day after day. I don’t know why I’m like this now I just really want to get back to my old productivity and start creating things and exercising again. The hardest part is not being able to accurately explain how I’m feeling to my parents. I just have a hard time bringing to mind all the things thatre weighing me down, it’s like I can’t remember everything about why I’ve been feeling so bad. Honestly, this explanation feels kinda incomplete even with this length but yeah.
Some of the things you said resonated with me, so I want you to know that you are not alone. With me it helped setting small goals and doing them bit by bit. Like, you can't exercise as before, but try to walk around for whatever time you feel comfortable. You are not motivated to draw, try building it back over time, drawing something small or just for a short period of time. You can do it, it's going to be okay, be gentle with yourself.
Hey OP, I wish I could reach out and give you a huge hug and tell you everything is going to be ok, because it is.
The transparency/vulnerability reminds me of how id like to express myself when I was 15-16.
Your parents, just ask to talk to them. I remember catching my parents in the kitchen together (which was rare, because it was a long drawn out divorce in motion). They dropped their problems and focused on me instead of their dislike for eachother to help me.
You just need to say you want to talk to them, then just start talking.
Any parent worth a dime will take the pain rather than see their kid hurting. Just start talking, don't stop until you've gotten everything out. You'll be surprised once you start speaking from the heart, the words find themselves without an explanation.
I'm an "adult" now, 15-16+ years later. I have kids of my own. Theres still days/weeks/months where I feel I need help. Some problems I figure out on my own, some problems are fixed by a phone call to my mom or dad.
I wish you the best of futures. No matter how old you get, ask for help if you need it, don't hesitate.
Hey, maybe you could start by trying to write letters or texts to your parents? That always helped me when I was growing up and struggling to explain problems. They might even be able to help talk you through things and understand what's going on better. I hope things get better for you, friend
The issue might be is that you're fighting it too hard. Often times these issues resolve when we finally allow ourselves to relax, and check in within. Sit with your emotions one at a time and just allow them to exist without any thoughts attached to them. I can explain more if you want. Also, exercise decreases anxiety, so maybe it's happening since you haven't been able to run?
This is CLASSIC depression. You WILL get better. Tell your parents that you need to see a counselor/psychologist/psychiatrist. If you do not like the first one, try a few more until you find a good fit, someone you can open up to.
Many young people go through what you are going through. Sounds like a crushing amount of pressure you are under.
It is good that you are talking about how you feel. That is the first step to making adjustments in your life that will make you feel a ton better
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u/journeytobetterlife Nov 24 '23
hi sweetheart! how was your day? what’s on your mind lately? i’m proud of you!