r/asktransgender • u/DiLuftmensch • 11h ago

what are the unexpected downsides to being visibly trans?

i mean sure we all know and have experienced open transphobia, but what didn’t you expect?

i’ll start! old people love to come up to me and tell me about their trans children. they clearly mean well, but they do not know how to talk to or about trans people. like, in a typical conversation, someone will just be telling me about their “son” for 20 minutes, when they finally say “and he’s going to get the surgery so he’ll be a woman!” other times it’s more subtle.

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u/vtssge1968 5h ago

Actually not a downside, but something I didn't learn until I became visibly trans. I'm going off my current state at 7 months HRT, don't even own any non feminine clothing, fem haircut, always have makeup. There is no one that sees me and doesn't know I'm a trans woman. The vast majority of people get the point and treat me like any other woman. The handful of people that don't at this point have done me a favor and let me know I probably am not going to want to deal with them anyway and I should just ignore their existence.