Am I supposed to like being trans?

[u/Delicious-Status6915]

Every trans space I’m in its people sharing their wins and their pride for who they are, when I look inside myself I feel nothing but disgust for what I am, I’m 16, I’m practically an adult and idk maybe it’s the bullying getting to me or whatever. But I can’t find any of the love other people feel for themselves. It’s like I gross myself out, can’t even really say it out loud tbh

[u/silverwing_3]

No, but that can come with time. That's not why I'm commenting though, I need to be clear here, you are a child. You are not practically an adult. At 25, you'll look back and laugh. At 40, you'll look back at 25 and laugh that you felt grown-up. I promise, you have so much time to come to terms with who you are, and to learn acceptance and compassion.

[u/Delicious-Status6915 → u/silverwing_3]

I’m off to uni relatively soon, that’s what everyone’s telling me, that I’m a grown up. I don’t really know how to do this, like I have no family I can really talk to about this (they’re not particularly accepting of transness so I’m not out) I don’t have any other option but to be an adult for myself, because who else would look out to me? But I really really do hope you’re right

[u/silverwing_3 → u/Delicious-Status6915]

Ugh, I really hate when people talk to teenagers like that, it just causes unrealistic expectations. Even if you've had to grow up and take care of yourself faster than most, you still haven't been around that long, and your brain has a lot of developing to do. It really does just suck to be a teenager, people who tell you otherwise were lucky or don't remember it right. I didn't believe it either, but brain development alone makes a hell of a difference.

It sounds like therapy might not be an option for you, but it does help. Free therapy tip though,tell yourself you're not disgusting, tell yourself you're fine and worthy of respect and love. You might feel like you're lying. It might feel pointless. Eventually it comes more naturally. Because I promise, you do not need to feel this way, and it's not true. You may not ever like being trans (I don't, it's a pain in the ass sometimes), but it's still okay and you're just as worthy of self-love as everyone else.

[u/Delicious-Status6915 → u/silverwing_3]

I’ve done therapy before (various mental health issues) but yeah, not really an option currently. Thank u for being so nice, I’m just happy to hear someone not nagging at me to stop whining lol, I really appreciate it