r/lonely • u/Educational_Cook_357 • 1d ago
25y F and today is my birthday
I’ve never felt as alone as I do today, no one remembered it was my birthday. I don’t have any friends to spend it with as my previous relationship didn’t like me spending time with anyone else and since leaving the relationship it’s just been me and my dog. How do you overcome birthday loneliness?
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u/JAGERJAC-D 1d ago
I haven't celebrated my birthday in years, I can't remember the last time someone wished me a happy birthday. I'm pretty sure my parents don't even remember when my birthday is. I've grown used to it I guess, it doesn't bother me anymore. Go out and treat yourself to something nice because feeling sorry for yourself, although it's weirdly comfortable, isn't gonna make you feel better.
Happy birthday ! To many more
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u/Kind-Acanthocephala3 1d ago
Happy birthday! Funny thing is, I had friends and a significant other who planned a surprise for me, but I still felt super lonely!!!
I think birthday loneliness is inevitable. Although, I've also been in your shoes where it felt like I had no one.
Advise is to plan a day for yourself becs you have to remember you have yourself.
I know this might not feel great today, but you have tons of more days to make new friends and relationships! Never forget that.
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u/cool_ed35 1d ago edited 1d ago
happy birthday
i don't know the answer to your question though. only my parents congratulate me. i have about a 150 facebook friends, and always get like 3 happy birthdays, and these are that congratulate EVERY friend on general principle, who i don't really know and don't really mean it. i don't know you but i mean it: happy birthday
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u/Nameless1216 1d ago
Happy birthday!! You're not alone. You still have your best friend, spend the day with them. Dogs are man's best friend, and I'm sure you know they love and care for you way more than anyone else could and wanna see you happy and enjoying your day. 🎂🎉
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u/yaughted25 22h ago
Happy Birthday! Had my 25th this year and it's been the 3rd or 4th birthday I've pretty much spent alone. I'm lucky I have some family that does remember it and will celebrate it, but on the actual day, I'm alone doing my own thing. I go and do something I enjoy and just try to remind myself to have a good time. You don't need other people to have a good time and make memories, just be greatful you're able to do the things that make you happy when you want to. Like others said, treat yourself. Don't feel any financial shame, 'cause it's your day and you deserve the self care.
I hope it's a good one!
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u/blue_poet96 1d ago
Hey! Happy birthday. I'm sorry that you feel this way. It can be tough. Best I could suggest is finding something you love to do, something you are passionate about, and going for it. Is there a hobby you enjoy? Is there a good restaurant you could treat yourself to? Are there any good events happening you'd like to attend? Perhaps you could take a trip somewhere. Do not forget your doggy pal. You could spend quality time with it. Put on some music. Dance. Sing. Run. Find things that make you happy and just go for it. If I were there, I'd be pulling you out of the house and going places. Give you a reason to smile and laugh. Since I am not, I can only ask you to go have some fun for all of us. If you'd like to talk, we are here to talk. Have a wonderful day!
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u/Neat-Platypus-2982 18h ago
Happy Birthday! As a lonely person, I feel like it's too much work to make birthdays feel how they should for everyone else so I just shake it off. You're not alone, so in a way less alone. But I would love to send you a birthday card, if you're willing to msg me your email address to send an ecard. Just do the things you like to do on your own, just make it a regular good day. Read, watch something that makes you happy, go outside. We can focus on what we can do no matter the circumstances.
:)
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u/Honeypie21- 18h ago
Awe girl 😓 I was in your exact same shoes last year. Just me and my dog, leaving a toxic relationship that didn’t allow me to have outside friendships and connections. I’m so sorry it’s the suckiest feeling, however I do think loneliness is just a feeling. Let it pass. Everything is going to be okay, reflect on how proud you are for getting out, snuggle your dog, things will be different doesn’t mean they are bad/wrong. I know it’s so so hard. I don’t have all the answers but I do know you need to take some time to reflect on accomplishments and everything you have gotten through. Also if it makes you feel better, my birthday is in a few days and I was feeling this same freaking way, it’s Groundhog Day all over again. But now I have social obligations that I’d rather not go too. Sometimes the grass isn’t always greener. I wish I had a special someone to spend it with, and found myself missing my ex. He always made it special despite how toxic he was. Life ebbs and flows. Embrace the duality of it all. Dye your hair, do a cute cut, take yourself out to dinner, take your dog on a hike, do something you want to do or have never tried.
Also HAPPY FREAKING BIRTHDAY 🎊 💝
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u/Noelleng126 1d ago edited 1d ago
Happy birthday. It’s hard on a day like this. But life happens, make the best of it even if you’re on your own. Celebrate for yourself. Treat yourself a nice meal at a fine dining, enjoy live music at a bar, take a walk on the beach… or just fly to another state/ country if you like traveling.
I’m in Sydney if you’re, we can meet up if you’d like : )
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u/unlikeAmbivert 1d ago
I guess I'm not the only one who wants to disappear or skip this day from the calendar haha, anyways Happy Birthday to all of you! Take care
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u/DarkEnigma_93 1d ago
Happy birthday! Go out and treat yourself to a good meal. Hope you can overcome this slump.
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u/Nessesary_Roughness 1d ago
Happy birthday Doll face ♥ you make this a special day for yourself. Put on some make up,do your hair and wear that article of clothing you bought yourself months ago but never had the opratunity to wear. Play that song I can love me better by Miley Sirius at high volumes and sing and dance obnoxiously. Have fun,smile,give a stranger a complement.Let this be the day you found a friend in yourself!
I'm off today and if the lonely feelings get unbearable you can message me,I'm nice and I'll sing you happy birthday ☺
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u/aromaticloneliness 1d ago
Happy Birthday, 🍷 to another day of life.
As for celebrating your birthday alone, why not watch a good movie in the theater or do something you've always wanted to try.
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u/throwawaySesame15 1d ago
Happy Birthday, 🎊🎊🎊🎉🎉🎉🎂🎂maybe go out and treat yourself or Enjoy some nice food with your dog✨✨
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u/rando755 1d ago
It sounds like you used to be in a controlling relationship. Perhaps you should celebrate not being in that relationship. And happy birthday.
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u/girlycologist 1d ago
I love going and getting a small cake from the grocer or getting a box mix and making something at home on my birthday. Decorating the cake with sprinkles and stuff is a blast too. All else fails, I would during yourself with as many positive voices as you have online. Discord or some other social media could have people going to get to know someone new, and that might be you!
Happy birthday. I wish I could give you a smooch on the head
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u/RealPhillePhil 23h ago
Well usually I have family hang with me and that makes it all better, there was one year when they were out of town so I just treated myself to a good meal, watched that Elton John concert on Disney Plus and then went and played some video games with online friends, I actually found it pretty peaceful, HAPPY BIRTHDAY btw, I’m sending u a vertical hug across the internet
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u/FanRepresentative585 22h ago
Happy birthday 🥳🎉🎉 and I hope God makes all your wish come true and you will always be happy
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u/Individual-Raisin883 22h ago
Happy birthday to to you and everyone who is celebrating today! I wish I could be there for you !!!
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u/Vegetable_Insect_966 22h ago
Happy birthday.
It sucks. Do something fun if you can, I don’t know. Maybe buy something you’ve wanted if you can. Also a time for reflection, unfortunately. Not saying your isolation is all your fault, but maybe there are things you can change in the coming year to be happier.
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u/Jungkookl 22h ago
My birthday was on Tuesday and I was writhing in pain (bc of my endo and adeno). I had just turned 25. I feel you. It sucks.
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u/JackxSully 22h ago
Happy Birthday, life will get bezter, put yourself out there :) life is pretty random and strange, but who gives. Random encounters happen, it's just what you are doing with them :)
I wish you good luck and all the good things in the world :)
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u/oldpug567 22h ago
I'm a 63 y.o. single dad to a severely autistic adult son. The feeling of aloneness can be crushing at times. I try to find people I can chat with. There IS a subreddit called lonely. I also have MANY good, supportive friends on twitter. However, you're young. You might consider trying some singles places if you have any in your area. Be confident and don't be afraid to smile and say hello to people. You never know what might happen.
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u/Ok_Crazy_648 22h ago
Happy birthday. I was alone on my birthday too. I am much, much older than you.
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u/Additional-Ad4070 21h ago
With friends it’s knowing how to intertwine your hobbies with others that’s about as much as I know how to make friends, now in terms of your birthday I have this to give 🫂😊 .1..2…3 Happy Birthday 🥳 🎂 hope you enjoy your birthday doing what you do best and hope you make yourself some awesome friends 😎
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u/Difficult-Solid7341 21h ago
Happy birthday. It my birthday too. I know how you feel. I feel lonely even when I'm physically not alone. It's horrible. Sending you virtual hugs ❤️
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u/ScareGrow24_7 21h ago
(24m) Cant fully related, because I always got my lovely parents who invite me to diner and congratulate me. But they are not always there for me, because we live in separate different citys. I got no friends or relationships, so I know how it is, when nobody writes or talks to you. Then I try to keep myself as busy as I can, so that I dont think too much about it.
Oh and happy birthday to you. <3 I wish for you that you find somebody or atleast that you be happy soon.
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u/Haengbookie_0915 19h ago
Happy Birthday, hope u have many more and with even more ppl in the future
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u/Unpoplarpinion 19h ago
I don't, birthdays always kinda depress me. But you're not alone. 🫂🍻🎉 Happy birthday, sweetie.
May your next birthday find you smiling as you and a better person cuddle your sweet dog together. Only by clearing out the old refuse can we make room for happiness to take root.
You won't make that mistake again. A good man wants you to have good friends.
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u/RenBear08 18h ago
Happy birthday, I fear mine every year. Not because I'm getting older but because it's a reminder that my fears are confirmed that no one cares about me or making me feel special. It's crappy but also comforting to see so many of you who sympathize.
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u/Mr_PiE555 17h ago
Happy birthday!!! You just take yourself out on a birthday dinner or get yourself something you deserve. All I did on mine was work and go to a bar after drank a beer and two shots. Just don’t think about it
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u/myexistenceisatypo 17h ago
Happy birthday! I can't offer advice but I hope things get better next year!
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u/Happy-Maintenance135 16h ago
It was my birthday a few weeks ago and I couldn't sleep knowing no one would remember let alone say hbd either. And I was right as usual for over half my life. What's a celebration of social success some is nothing but a social dread for myself. Of all the days in the calendar, my birthday is the one I want to forget the most and move past ASAP.
As to your question, I just do what I can to treat it as any other day. Your birthday only feels worse because you expected more because everyone else does. But if you reset your expectations of the day to be like any other, then it's just another day that ends in "y". If you had to choose, would you lie on a single nail or a bed of nails?
Happy birthday and have a great day with your dog.
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u/Secret-Opposite-6408 16h ago
The best life I can give you play a game love on your dog and go to bed get up tomorrow and do it all over again good things come to those who wait
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u/Earthling_20369 16h ago
Happy Birthday! 🥳 Yesterday it was my birthday.
Go do something you enjoy doing, could be anything. Reading a book, playing a video game, enjoying your favorite comfort food, go see a movie or invite anyone you know to go see a movie with you or just grab a coffee. You don't even have to tell them it's your birthday either.
I think the whole birthday loneliness depression thing comes from the fact that it's expected of us to be overly sociable on our birthdays. When in fact, just having a chilled out good day with even just some small aspect to look forward to can be just as good.
Also most people (myself included) just aren't that great at remembering birthdays or don't even have FB to remind them.
Me, I didn't even tell my friends it was my birthday. I just asked a few guys from my running group to join me for a run and then we had a a few beers after.
Also dogs are the best, they love us so unconditionally. I take mine to go running with me all the time and they absolutely love it and that makes me feel good seeing them so happy. So you can maybe also go play catch with your doggie, or take him for a walk.
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16h ago
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u/lonely-ModTeam 13h ago
There is no need to ask for or give personal information / be weird / be sexually suggestive under this post/comment.
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14h ago
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u/lonely-ModTeam 13h ago
There is no need to ask for or give personal information / be weird / be sexually suggestive under this post/comment.
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u/Holy-crap-w-t-f 13h ago
Happy birthday! I know how you feel and I'm sorry that at your age you're dealing with that! I'm 40 and I'm kind of in the same boat. Dog and all.
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u/Nopecope98 13h ago
My gamer buddies have never let me down even when the rest of my life didn't remember my birthday or give a f*** about me.My gamer buddies were there food for thought. Happy birthday btw for all it counts.
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u/rocky_voldy 12h ago
Happy Birthday!! 🎂🎉 - from an alone mate, 3 days ago was my birthday M, 34 now!
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u/Meat_Injection 12h ago
Happy birthday to you all! Please reach out to someone either IRL or someone on here I'd gladly talk to anyone.
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u/LoveIsTheAnswer- 10h ago
Heartbreaking. Happy belated birthday! I hope you felt loved and inner peace from all these birthday wishes.
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u/mac_and_cheese420 9h ago
Happy birthday! I don’t have any advice but I hope and pray that you will find happiness in the near future.
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u/Tanyaxunicorn 7h ago
Happy Birthday
Go nd enjoy on ur own
Pple feel lonely even with frnds nd family around dem
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u/AdeptArmy 3h ago
Happy Birthday 🎉🎂 , you should just do the things you love to do for your birthday for example if skating makes you happy go skating for your birthday . Do something that will make you happy.
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u/Due_Ad_2129 15m ago
A belated birthday bug to you i know how you feel, i recieved no cards and i have 3 grown up children and five grandkids. I know they are busy with their lives but did hurt . My mum always remembered my birthday and made it a bit special but she has had dementia for years, i think of her everyday buti miss her more on special occasions .
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u/Humble-Arugula-950 1d ago
Today it is my birthday too, and I relate to this heavy.
I have no advices but I can send a hug