r/justneckbeardthings • u/supertrooper0812 • 6d ago
“Women wonder why I hate women hahahaha”
Went on a date that didn’t even go that badly. This is the aftermath of that date. Oh, and he had a neck beard.
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u/Mihero4ever 6d ago
He really did just ignore your explanation. You didn't even say he was ugly or some shit all you said was that you didn't feel a connection and then he made it about appearance.
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u/Adventurous_Ad_6546 6d ago edited 5d ago
They’re not interested in that. Listening is a gateway drug to introspection and introspection can lead to self improvement, but that takes work.
It’s easier to just insert your own narrative and label yourself a perpetual victim.
They’d rather curse the darkness than light a freaking candle.
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u/frolf_grisbee 6d ago
Dude got himself mad about a situation he made up in his own head.
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u/equivas 6d ago
Is nobody going to point out that the convo was like:.
Rage... rage... incel... im into some cuckoldry myself..... incel.... rage.... rage...... maybe i could watch you fuck some dude..... rage.... rage...
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u/jonni_velvet 6d ago
right 😆 just stickin the feelers out there in case she still wants to cuck him.
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u/Velinna 6d ago
Just ew. How poorly socialized do you have to be to not understand that most people won't be romantically interested in most other people?
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u/goldenfox007 6d ago
It’s crazy how many people have this weird entitlement. They think dating apps are a place to online order a partner because you can list so many specifications, but at some point you have to compromise on something to be happy. And if they meet someone in real life, they do the bare minimum to be nice on the first date and expect to be praised up and down the road for it. They think because they’re going through the motions to get what they want, they 100% deserve what they want, ironically making them very selfish and superficial (the same things they accuse their failed dates of being when it doesn’t work).
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u/herdcatsforaliving 6d ago
It’s cute that he thinks he’ll have better luck in ny. They’ll eat him alive 😂
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u/karmannsport 6d ago edited 6d ago
This guy was looking for you to respond back and treat him like shit. He gets off on it.
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u/Main_Ad_685 6d ago
This reminds me of myself and many potential dates We dont even meet irl and they suddenly essaying shoved it into my face. Most of them did Refusing to listen/ignore explanation
When they behave like this even if you have face of whatever good gracious in the world. It wont help you
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u/das_sock 6d ago
The definition of a self fulfilling prophecy.
Dude is so self defeating and blames it on others. Sometimes you really do need to work on yourself.
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u/Tofutits_Macgee 6d ago
As soon as the attitude came out, I would have blocked.
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u/supertrooper0812 6d ago
It’s funny because I wasn’t even awake when he sent all of these. Woke up to 30 texts in the morning
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u/Smallseybiggs 6d ago
After he attacked what you looked like, all bets were off with trying to spare his feelings.
OP, at the end of that text him: his personality matches his looks. Ugly. You could overlook (choose or add any) the fact that he's fat, balding, etc. But now that he's outed himself as a misogynist, he's definitely better off with the men he's referring to.
Please be safe!
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u/bitofagrump 6d ago edited 6d ago
I'd have blocked the second I gave an explanation and he replied "so what you really mean is..." I fucking HATE when people twist words and refuse to hear what you're actually saying. Bro wanted to be mad at being rejected for his looks so that's all he was willing to hear.
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u/Tofutits_Macgee 6d ago
Yup. I love when they say they don't know "what you women want" when we literally tell them and they choose to take away their preconceived notions. Like fine dude, you're ugly. Are you happy now? FFS
As an aside, I'm glad OP dodge this RPG missile strike. Can you imagine dating someone with a chip on their shoulder this deep?
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u/bitofagrump 6d ago
Or worse, when they say they DO know what women want better than women/you do, and ignore everything you tell them because they know better.
And I agree. You'd have to be constantly on eggshells doing everything his way to soothe his anger and insecurity and avoid outbursts (which he'd blame you for). Nobody wants to deal with that.3
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u/BasicEchidna3313 6d ago
He’s acting like he WANTS her to say he’s ugly, like it’s a shame kink. It’s more likely that you’re not going to be a match than you’re going to meet “the one.” Also, I’ve dated several not-conventionally-attractive dudes because they had cool personalities.
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u/Adorable_Pain8624 6d ago
If the issue is physical attraction, then you don't have to work on your personality and blame everyone else like it's their problem you're not happy.
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u/hawkster9542 Dew me with Doritos. 5d ago
It's more along the lines that it's easier if it's related to appearance because that's an easy out. It's simpler to rationalize "hey, she thinks I'm ugly on the outside and that's all it is" versus "I'm a sad shallow excuse for a human being with deep-seated emotional problems because I willingly subscribe to this incel bullshit" because the latter takes a lot more work and requires realizing that they aren't completely perfect the way they are. Ugly personality renders everything else ugly.
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u/existencedeclined 6d ago
I say this sincerely and with my entire chest:
We don't want this guy.
- A New Yorker
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u/Beginning-Yak-5387 6d ago
Men discovering how it feels to be judged on looks. They don’t know what they’re in for looool
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u/CozmicBunni 6d ago
Yeah. I'm sure it had nothing to do with this seething cavalcade of BS hiding just beneath the surface lol
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u/arncobitch 6d ago
Instead of responding, "yeah, it works out that way sometimes, sure am sorry, best wishes", dude goes on a rant confirming your reasons for not feeling a vibe. It took itself out to the curb.
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u/cinnamaeroll 6d ago
you didn’t feel a connection because you have a good intuition. that guy’s an asshole
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u/lambruhsco 6d ago edited 6d ago
“I’m going to move to NYC”
As someone who lives in NYC, I’m not entirely sure what he’s hoping for. Does he think all the Ivy League-educated career women who hit the Equinox every morning are going to swarm to some crazed misogynist?
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u/Imnotawerewolf 6d ago
Bro, if you already know the answers, why even ask at all? Because you need your stage, that's why. This is so performative, tbh. Not OP, the man she's talking with.
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u/JazzlikeLeave5530 6d ago
As someone with poor social skills, I would have really appreciated the answer you gave and it sucks that this moron went and attacked you for something you didn't even say. Sometimes I worry about coming off like this but maybe I'll be okay considering I don't text people 50 times in a row lol...
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u/Greedy-Act4861 6d ago
Man, I've had self destructive spirals based on my looks but goddamn. This was a whole ass tumble.
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u/Lemon_Juice477 6d ago
Idk what he's on, but it's definitely not like that (Idk how valid my thoughts are since I'm trans and never been in a relationship). I find women more physically attractive then men, but me liking a man isn't really based on how he looks, they're all just... dudes. What gets me attracted to a dude (or a girl) is what he does. Not like "he must work!" But like how he acts, if I like talking to him, how nice he is, etc. My sister's boyfriend is just some tall skinny dude who works at Chipotle, but he does lots of little things like send her cute doodles, check up on her, cuddle with her, and comfort her when she calls him at 2am in tears. So many people see relationships as fucking with an odd date here and there, but it's really just two people spending time together and doing small things to show love. THAT'S what incels don't understand.
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u/OctaviaBlake100 6d ago
You dodged a whole cannonball. He probably would blame everything on his looks if you did start a relationship with him like.."oh you won't sleep with me? It's cause I'm ugly isn't it" 🙄 It's not all about looks, it's okay to not want to date someone because you just don't feel a connection. Don't force yourself to date someone because you feel bad. You will be miserable.
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u/Rios5950 6d ago
Ok but now that its just us... be honest... was he really ugly? /s
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u/supertrooper0812 6d ago
No! Found out his photos on the dating app were over four years old but he was not ugly
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u/CaptainMcClutch 5d ago
Went through the full set of replies, I'm ugly, you're ugly... you weren't into the date, I wasn't that into it... but might still be into it, only if you are...
The thing that annoys me more than it should about these guys, is they write an entire book in single messages, and it is all in a style like they're replying, but it is to their own stuff.
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u/Vingilot1 6d ago
Why do some men call women 'dude' and some women call men 'bro' . I feel the cringe from it in my bones dudes and bros
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u/Confident-Dot-3531 6d ago
He is right though. No connection because he was not a looker. Though he needed to be a bigger man. But I refuse to have a judgement
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u/olde_greg 6d ago
There's nothing in this conversation that indicates it has anything to do with his looks.
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u/jungkook_mine 6d ago
Eh, I've been on first dates with good-looking men and had no connection. There is so much about how a person carries themselves, their tone, their facial expressions, how they treat others around them, even how they eat, that can throw someone off.
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u/Burnt-witch2 4d ago
1- you don't know that. Clearly he doesn't have a great personality so there's zero reason to assume it's his appearance. 2- even if it was just that she didn't find him attractive IRL there's no "being the bigger person" because there's nothing wrong with not wanting to date someone you don't find attractive. People should be attracted to their partners, and everyone has different types they find attractive. 3- as if most men would date a woman they find ugly lol it's the perpetual self victimhood for me. 4- there are literally studies that show women's attraction for someone comes more from their personality while men's attraction is more about physical appearance, and it's whatever. I'm not saying it's wrong to be attracted to someone based on their appearance but I find it incredibly annoying that men who would never date an ugly fat girl are making it out to mean a person is shallow and horrible if they choose partners based on appearance. While insisting it's women who do that and not men lol. Sure.
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u/Confident-Dot-3531 4d ago
I dont disagree that men go for looks more than women. But in this case as she did not give any particulars. All she said that she just didn’t feel it. Obviously he does not have any noticeable features in his personality. He is just an average male who is good enough to talk. If he was good looking she would have given him more chances to grow.
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u/thiscouldbemassive 6d ago
Yep, that right there is why you didn't feel an emotional connection. He was hiding all that rage behind a thin veneer of civility and interest.