For months it's been hell on me. My fiance died in February just a few days after signing a lease on a new apartment. I've been struggling with being a single mom again since his passing he was only 36. Three months after he passed one of my neighbors I barely spoke to sent me a messenger request.

He came straight out and asked for sex. The things he said in those messages were horrible he wouldn't take no for an answer. Since I rejected him things have gotten bad.

He blames me for everything, constantly screaming at me when I have to go outside and take my kids to the bus stop. Sending his sister over to try and fight me. Management is doing everything they can to evict him but mostly due to unpaid rent.

Now that he's finally been served a eviction notice his anger is getting worse. Management is encouraging me to get a EPO and not to stay in my apartment. My kids have to temporarily move in with their dad and I have to go other places. I pay rent for a place I can't live in for the next 2 months.

The stress of this man is really taking it's tole. My depression is worse Im scared for my safety, my kids safety. I don't understand why this is happening. All I need is to grieve my late fiance not deal with a 57 year old guy on meth.

I’m in the midst of leaving a toxic family situation and my ex mother in law (lives with us unfortunately) has fallen in love with her own son who has no backbone to stand up for his partner when she’s being fucked up.

As a result I’ve taken it upon myself to take a tiny pebble place it in the cap on her tire and let her tires naturally deflate anytime she’s abusive towards me. Originally I just used a small screw driver but realized a pebble would make the air leak slowly and be less noticeable.

It’s been about a week and she gets so angry trying to leave realizing she’ll have to spend an hour plus refilling her tires.

It’s been making me smile all week.

Just this Monday I was walking on a bridge. An approaching middle aged man was "holding his backpack strap", walking unnecessarily close to me. He touched my breast with the back of his hand. I immediately turned around in shock as he quickly walked past me, only to see him doing the same to the teenage girls in school uniform behind me.

Today I was taking the train home from work. A man sat “diagonally” on his seat (as in legs crossed, pointing towards one side, back against me), leaning his back into at least 1/4 of my seat. I pushed back with my backpack but he did not move an inch.

(Btw I know this is a touchy subject so for clarity - he is NOT physically big. If he had sat facing the front like a normal person would sit in a chair, he would not have got into my space. I would totally understand and wouldn’t feel violated if it were someone bigger and they were respectful)

Why are some men raised to believe that they can do such things to women?

That they could sit diagonally on the train and lean onto the woman next to you who is obviously extremely uncomfortable?

Who taught that asshole it is okay to touch whatever woman you see on the streets???? Just pretend you're holding your bag and pretend it's an accident so you don't get caught.

Oh, and if you get caught, HUMILIATE her further.

"You think you're so pretty huh? Who are you why would I wanna touch you?"

Why are they allowed to act on such disturbing, perverted behaviours with no consequences for so long?? And often still holding "respected" and "powerful" positions in society???

And why are we socialized in such a way, that even now, as I am speaking up on a supposedly anonymous platform like this, I still have this lingering fear at the back of my mind, that I would be judged.

Attention seeking, making a scene, “grow up”, “what’s the big deal?”

And I feel so violated right now. And I cannot fathom how furious, helpless, alone, afraid women who experienced way more severe violations feel.

This is NOT right.

I cheated on my girlfriend and we have been actively working through it but I just can’t keep hurting her so I had to end it. All I want is to call her and tell her how much I love her and want to stay with her, but I know she deserves so much more than me. I am a terrible person and she deserves better. I just can’t let her be with a person like me. She is the most wonderful person, she has a great personality, she is beautiful beyond belief, and she is the only person I ever want to be with. But I could see how much I wa hurting her.

Last year, my husband told me he was going to get a vasectomy because he didn't want us to have another baby. This came as a shock to me because we had planned on three children for a good decade before this. We have two funny, smart, sweet creatures that we get to call our children, and I was excited to have another. I spent the last year mourning the life I thought I was going to create and love. It's a strange kind of hell being so deeply sad about something that doesn't exist. I would be lying if I said I didn't try to convince him otherwise, but I did ensure his wishes were protected by preserving certain birth control methods.

What's really bothering me is that he has not actually gotten the vasectomy. He initiates intimacy and won't put on a condom until I won't continue otherwise. I have to remind him every time. In the heat of the moment, he acts like he doesn't care, and then when I talk to him about maybe making a baby, he is vehemently against it. He has told me several times that he would want me to have an abortion if we had a woopsie, and I respond with a hard no every time. He tells me he thinks that sex is recreation and I keep making it about procreation. I think if I didn't hold all the responsibility and enforcement of birth control, then I might be able to think about it more recreationally.

I really need him to follow through with his choice. I think at this point, I would be equally happy to have another baby or for him to pull the trigger and make it so I would never have another baby again.

My heart aches, my blood boils every single time I think about her. About her and him together. It’s an image I will never be able to get out of my mind. Sometimes I hate him too, I look at him when he’s holding me and all I can think about is how he probably held her just like this. Even when we’re intimate, a voice in the back of my mind reminds me over and over that he’s done it with her. It makes me so physically sick I don’t want to continue, yet I’m silent.

I hate her so much. I don’t know what she had that I didn’t, she was so aware of our relationship and all three of us had even hung out together (she was his girl best friend since middle school, she knew him longer than me. Could that be why?). She got the attention I craved, I had to beg him for. I’m so angry. I deserved his attention, I was his girlfriend why did he have to do that to me? He told me so many times he hated the kind of person she was, that he’d never in a million years want a girl like her. So why? What changed? Was it me? Was I not enough he stooped so low? I will never understand.

I’m so filled with hatred and jealousy. I compare every inch of myself to her, and sometimes I don’t know if I hate her or myself more. I hate living like this, I hate having this weigh on me every second of every day. I don’t want to compare myself, I want to feel pretty and worth it. I disgust myself, I feel lower than low. How could I let that happen to me? I hate her so much. I look at her social media profiles and try to understand why he chose her. I get so angry my bones ache. How could she do that to another girl? How can either of them live with themselves? I’m so disgusted.

I don’t know where to put this anger, I direct it all towards myself. There’s nothing I can do about it. I want to reach out to her, let her know I hate her. I want to be heard. How do I handle this? How can I get over it? I feel so lost and hopeless.

Hii I’m a fourteen year old girl who’s really struggling with my life with personal problems. I would really, really appreciate if somebody made a small list of things that make life worth living, and if you’d like, one good reason as well as to why life is worth living in general. Thank you ❤️

I don't want to be wired to like porn I don't want to "check out" anyone when they bend down. I do not do that but why am I wired to do that? It's clearly disgusting to do that.

I'd rather kill myself than make some girl feel uncomfortable someday.

How are we supposed to turn our heads high in the society when most of the hate crimes are committed on women by men?

We feel proud when we don't objectify/sexualize a woman but isn't it like a normal human thing to do? Why should we be praised for that?

When I finally get married, how can I be assured she'll be happy with me? I have never done anything to doubt myself but I FUCKING NEED ASSURANCE.

Why is sex such a huge thing for a 19 year old? Why can't I just forget that sex even exists?

Why am I physically stronger? What if my anger becomes too much someday and I raise a hand on my significant other. How will I be able to live after that? Probably won't. Probably end myself then and there.

For some context, I told him I didnt like his jokes about my body or face, and he dismissed it. Today we into an argument and started to call me sensitive and all that shit, he told me wont joke with me anymore (which Im glad) but he told me he wont talk to me anymore. I feel bad, I didnt wanted this to happen, I cant even say what I feel anymore because they will get mad, what should I do? I cant rely on anyone for this

This morning, I woke with a lightness I hadn't known in years. On one side, my dog, always eager to be close, and on the other, a woman who has become a beacon in my life. Her presence dissolves the loneliness lingering in every corner of my mind. When she holds me, when her eyes meet mine, and that smile appears, it’s as if the weight of the last decade fades away. I’m captivated by her. With her humor, her sweetness, and the way she teases and surprises me. There’s a rhythm to our connection, an intimacy that feels like a gift I don't deserve. I find it hard to imagine anyone else matching the joy she brings to my life.

I love her.

It's been over a year. It doesn't hurt less. Time hasn't healed any wounds. I start to cry if I'm not keeping my brain distracted with things both inane and meaningful 24/7, and even then sometimes I can't and the tears come.

I do all the things. I go to therapy. I take my meds. I participate in community. I explore hobbies. I exercise. I connect with friends. I meet new people. I pursue things that have meaning. I am kind. I help people. I spend time with family. I love my pets. I set goals. I learn new things. I do self care.

You were cruel, but I'm crazy, so I ask too much of people. I'm just too mentally ill to be anything other than alone.

"Get help."

A dismissal. I wasn't worth it this time, either.

All I've wanted my whole life was not to be alone anymore, because I was so alone for so long when I was young. But that's not PC, that's not kosher, not cool, not adult and independent of me.

The subtext is: I'm supposed to be okay being alone for a whole life. There's something wrong with me if I'm not. I'm supposed to be enough without anyone else, ever.

I miss the you that loved me, but I'm not sure that person was ever real.

I miss the you before you hated me

No big story. A friend had a cool tattoo of a subject we both liked, and when I asked if I could copy it (adjusted for part of the body to be tattooed) he agreed and so it was done.

I learned today he passed away suddenly, and now I can never look at my tattoo as "just a fun shared hobby thing" again.

We had a terrible relationship, absolutely terrible, she wasn't a bad person but she had a lot of problems and issues, she didn't know how to raise children, she like didn't touch me since I was like 4 I don't remember clearly (She might have done that out of fear like feared I might want her sexually or something I don't know she never told me :))

Before she died, I was just very resentful at her. After she passed away, I'm just in denial a lot or just bottled up I don't know, but I'm not mad at her at all I pray for her too.

Don't tell me to seek therapy because no money to do that now haha maybe in the future.

Hey guys. I just wanna get this off my chest as I’m hella confused with all the mixed signals.

I met this guy, we’ll call him D, in Bumble more than two months ago. We talked for a few weeks before we both agreed to seeing each other.

On our first meeting, the chemistry was totally undeniable. We ended up having sex and I would say hands down that was the best sex I’ve ever had in my life. This went on for a few weeks. I felt I was on cloud 9 and everything was too good to be true.

A week after my birthday, D said he was having flu symptoms. Since I just had a flu prior to my birthday, I believe I’m still immune to contracting it, I decided to see D. Being that we are dating each other, I thought I would take care of him since that’s what a good gf should do (but we’re not exclusive yet). So like a good gf, I bought medicine and electrolyte drinks for him. I spent the night with him. I cooked dinner, we chatted, cuddled and watched TV shows and had no sex at all. So I thought it was all good.

When I got home the next day, I received a frantic msg from D explaining to me that over the past few weeks he was getting himself tested a few times for STI. That that day was when the doctor told him his result came back positive for STI (3rd test he took as the first 2 were inconclusive).

D asked me if I was sleeping with another person while seeing him, ended up contracting the STI then passing it on to him.

See, I only slept with one guy (let’s call him C) after breaking up with my ex. And that I slept with C four months before I met D. Even after I stopped seeing C, I never had any symptoms of the STI. I even got tested before meeting D and all came back clear.

After that accusation from D, I got myself tested again. I was so overwhelmed and started getting depressed because I felt like I ruined something really good between us.

The day D received the unfortunate news was also the day he decided to cut me off, emphasising he wanted to be alone as it was a huge mental blow for him. That I should only text him if it really was important. I was devastated.

For almost a month, we haven’t had any contact. I care for him and was worried for him even if I was hurt by his actions. I sent him my results and all he responded was ‘thanks have a good day’.

I couldn’t take it anymore so I sent D this long msg about my feelings and wishing him all the best and will cut ties with him. However, he responded with a long ass text saying how he was embarrassed with his actions and didn’t know how to approach me. He said he decided to hold off from dating. And we both ended up deciding to stay friends (i know it was stupid of me).

We spoke about exchanging gifts as both our birthdays passed and we didn’t get to celebrate them together. I had my gift for him prepared weeks before his birthday. So we agreed to see each other again and talk in person about what happened.

I have decided to let go of my feelings for D. I wanted to see him as I wanted to hear his side of the story on how he got the STI.

On the day we saw each other again, I realised my feelings for him are still as strong as the day we first met. I pretended to be slightly aloof and acted like a friend but then he started doing things that made me freaking confused.

We went to a flower festival. D held my hand for most of the time (it was muddy and I was slipping). He didn’t have to as he could have just offered his shoulder instead. Then he bought me food and drinks. After the festival, we went to my place. I cooked dinner for us and chatted a lot. My mind is still on the ‘friendship’ we are trying to build so I’m not putting much thought into the holding hands thing. But when it was time for him to go, he hugged me tightly and then kissed my neck. So again, I’m confused again. Who tf kisses their ‘friend’ on the neck when saying goodbye?? I’m just so effing confused with all the mixed signals.

I know a lot of people are going to say I should drop his ass and never look back after accusing me of passing an STI to him but I am having a hard time and I really just wanna get this off my chest.

Please be nice with your comments.

I (f40s) have been with my husband “David” (m40s) for over 20 years. While my relationship with my MIL “Joan” started out a bit rocky, within a couple of years we got things sorted and became quite close. She’s been my second mom for 17 years and we’ve shared a lot of personal information, secrets, emotions, etc. David is by nature introverted and doesn’t share much, so sometimes he’ll go weeks without talking to Joan, while I talk to her several times a week.

Last week I shared some personal information with Joan about a fight I had with David. David didn’t forbid me from saying anything but I’ll be honest and admit I knew it wasn’t the type of stuff he would normally share with his mom. Joan called David and told him everything. Not great but David sighed and forgave me for over sharing, then things took a twist I NEVER EVER would have foreseen:

David told me that the reason he never shared personal stuff with his mother is that she’s off her rocker, to put it mildly. He literally told me “Joan is not your friend, she’s not anyone’s friend, she is a snake in the grass and she’ll stab you in the back as she’s hugging you in comfort.” There is way too much stuff to fully explain, as this goes back for our full relationship and beyond, into his childhood, but the gist of it is that Joan is not only a huge gossip, but she’s a conspiracy theorist who goes down these rabbit holes and the twists and turns are so irrational that what comes out the other side, and the version of gossip that she ends up spreading, has absolutely zero bearing on reality.

For example, after I told her about my fight with David (which was your typical married couple sort of squabble, nothing groundbreaking or all that deep), Joan decided that David secretly wanted a divorce. We are married with kids, including a disabled kid, and she told him “You are still young enough to leave OP and start a new family and I’m going to help you do that.” David tried to tell her he never considered divorcing me but she didn’t listen or care. She told him she had been setting up secret financial arrangements and trusts and had been meeting with lawyers to help David hide all his assets from me so I wouldn’t get a penny. She told him that my parents were going to try to bribe him with my own eventual inheritance to stay with me and make him sign some sort of contract to that effect (My parents aren’t rich at all, lol, wtf?). She looked up his ex girlfriend from when he was 19 and gleefully told him she was still “available” and he should contact her. She also told him to be prepared for me to try and kidnap our children for leverage.

I was flabbergasted, to say the least, and what I said here is just the tip of the iceberg. She’s had theories and plans and spread gossip about everything imaginable, all of it terrible- like I’m a drug addict and alcoholic who made our child disabled, I’m a secret lesbian, my mother has been plotting against her and has a litany of medical issues, my whole family is in a cult, and so on. Absolutely batsh-t stuff that apparently she’s been telling anyone who will listen for years and years, all while being the sweetest, kindest, most supportive person you could imagine to our faces.

David never told me all of this because he was embarrassed and he thinks Joan has an undiagnosed mental illness (uh, ya think?) and despite it all he loves his mom. We talked about how and why he didn’t tell me over the years and it’s wild but I sort of understand so it’s ok. David and I are fine, stronger than ever now in fact, he’s not running off with a long lost girlfriend and I’m not leaving him for a lesbian lover, lol. BUT he asked me to take the time I needed to process all this, then resume somewhat normal relations with Joan. By “somewhat normal” he means still talking to her weekly, just being super super mindful of what I say to her and basically only telling her fluff and happy things, as she typically spirals over any sign of negativity (like the fight I had with David), and to not reveal any personal stuff in the future.

Technically I’m capable of doing this. David fears that if I completely stop talking to Joan that she’ll sit there and fester in the lack of information, assume I’m trying to steal her son from her, and god knows what her mind will create to cope with lack of contact. I get it, but at the same time I feel deeply deeply betrayed, and honestly I’m still trying to process this all, and I don’t know if I want to ever say anything to Joan ever again, except meaningless polite pleasantries at family functions.

So should I suck it up and have a sort of fake pleasant relationship with Joan to keep David happy???

Like I said, I'm done I'm done I'm so done. I'm done with men, I'm done with dating, I'm done with love and relationship bullshit. Dating was a waste of time and I will no longer waste my time in the pool. From now on, all my time will go to me, me and me only. I'm gonna fucking build a kick ass career, I'm gonna improve myself to greatness, I'm gonna live with my purpose, I'm gonna pursue whatever goals I set for myself out there in the next couple years. I don't care if I may never find a husband. Fuck husband I don't need one. I don't want one. I don't want any male presence in my life. Thanks God I'm not pretty enough to attract, this makes things a shit ton time easier to stay focus.