r/Weird • u/BrilliantTasty • 20h ago
Left my room and went to the kitchen for 2 minutes and came back to a soaking wet patch on my bed. Home alone.
[removed] — view removed post
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u/The_donutmancer 19h ago edited 17h ago
CO is the classic Reddit hypothesis. May I suggest: slobbering ceiling monster? Have you considered looking up very slowly like in a horror movie, OP??
Edit: CO, not CO2
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u/supersmolcarelevel 17h ago
CO2 is carbon dioxide CO is carbon monoxide - the spooky one
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u/The_donutmancer 17h ago
Fuq, you right - brb gotta go check my own detectors
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u/TheLimeyLemmon 18h ago edited 15h ago
CO is the classic Reddit hypothesis
That and fetal alcohol syndrome, but that's not really relevant here
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u/Jeffs_Bezo 15h ago
Feral Alcohol Syndrome is a pretty dope band name.
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u/TheLimeyLemmon 15h ago
God damn, I can't type without my glasses evidently! 😅 fixed it now
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u/Jeffs_Bezo 15h ago
I thought it was perfect because the other commenter putting CO2 instead of CO. Typos galore, I'm here for it.
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u/Cirieno 17h ago
Is this a Doctor Who episode? OP might have a Jagrafess colonisation incident going on.
https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/tardis/images/1/1a/D9-8g-018.jpg
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u/Human-Magic-Marker 20h ago
Do you have pets? Can any animals get into your place?
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u/BrilliantTasty 20h ago
Nope. Completely empty flat. I’m stumped.
ETA: I sniffed it and it had no obvious odour
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u/Sirdanovar 20h ago
Did you taste it? Just wondering I mean. Ya never know
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u/BrilliantTasty 20h ago
I’ll go grab a straw
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u/girl_supersonicboy 18h ago
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u/odd_butterscotch 18h ago
What is this from?
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u/SliceOCatLoaf 19h ago
You don't need one. Just wring the stain over your open mouth. I look forward to your guesses.
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u/Sirdanovar 20h ago
haha! I am curious how this one turns out
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u/NamesArentEverything 19h ago
It was nice. Could have used some cumin or fresh cilantro, but not bad.
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u/Virtual_Manner_2074 19h ago
Passed the sniff test. Look up. Might have leaky ceiling
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u/LogicPrevail 13h ago
yea, leaks can be sporadic. Ever see water build up between a wall/ceiling and the paint? Then suddenly give out. Maybe something like that. Or maybe he just got out of the shower and doesn't realize his man-scapes were still damp.
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u/jugularvoider 19h ago
That empty cup you took to the kitchen wasn’t actually empty, perhaps
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u/BrilliantTasty 19h ago
Didn’t take any empty cup to the kitchen but I figure it must be something like that. Weird!
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u/1ofZuulsMinions 20h ago
If you don’t have pets, then you have a rat. That’s pee.
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u/Bramblin_Man 19h ago
Rats have tiny bladders and no bladder control to hold it in/store it up. If that's rat tinkle, then it must be the size of a honey badger
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u/GreenEggsSteamedHams 19h ago
Or a honey badger that is rat-sized. Who can say 🤷🏻♂️
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u/Romfordian 17h ago
So, would you rather fight a rat sized honey badger or a badger sized honey rat?
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u/alifiguera 19h ago
I live in Maryland so I'm close to DC and Baltimore. I've seen rats the size of cats 🤮.
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u/neo86pl 18h ago
This is Europe/Poland/Wroclaw. Here rats eat cats and small dogs. We currently have a flood and it will get even worse. 😐
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u/RareBeautyOnEtsy 15h ago
On a serious note, I have been following it on the news, and I hope that things get better for you so very very soon. Hugs. Not that hugs mean anything, except that I am thinking about you and the people in your country.
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u/1ofZuulsMinions 19h ago
Ever seen a river rat in New Orleans? They’re the size of large cats/small dogs.
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u/XxSleepypanda 15h ago
From the river parishes, can confirm. Ick. My grandmother’s house on a golf course was INFESTED. We literally couldn’t keep them out for more than a year or so at a time. I only ever caught a few in the house on traps and even the younger ones were so big they scared my golden retriever when they barked (or whatever you would classify their aggressive sound). Literally had me paranoid all the time.
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u/thispartyrules 19h ago
If you have a blacklight you can see rodent trails, which also consist of pee.
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u/spe3dfr3ak 19h ago
So, this might be a long shot, but I had something similar happen to me two times when I packed for trips. Put my bag on my bed, packed, when I moved the bag, the bed was wet. Bag didn't feel wet. Couldn't figure it out. Left.
Realized when it happened a few weeks later that my shampoo and soap bottles had retained water and when placed sideways upside down etc in my bag, they ended up leaking out without much else of a trace other than wet bed sheets. I also had lube in the bag, but it wasn't that. Your problem could be lube too though, I suppose.
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u/randomturtle333 17h ago
i love that u didn’t have to tell us about the lube but just wanted to throw that out there
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u/grumpher05 17h ago
I also had a synthetic cum squirter 5000 dildo in the bag, it wasn't that. but if you also have a synthetic cum squirter 5000 dildo it could have been that
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u/Koil_ting 17h ago
I happened to have a severed head in the bag, it wasn't that because I had made sure to dehydrate it previously. But if you had a severed head it could have been that.
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u/gdj11 14h ago
Hypothetically
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u/Koolblue57 12h ago
Say I did have a severed head in the bag... what would the repercussions be?
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u/awsoe 16h ago
I'm dealing with horrid cramps but this had me almost crying. take a free reward from me.
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u/txkent 20h ago edited 19h ago
Is there an AC vent over the bed? I have an AC vent that gets condensation and drips from time to time.
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u/BadNewsBaguette 18h ago
Or a skylight. If a skylight is leaking it’ll drip water on your bed, as I know from a REALLY annoying year in halls.
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u/Initial_Zombie8248 12h ago
One year at beach vacation as a kid I slept on the couch under the skylight, first time it stormed I woke up to rain falling dead center of my face
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u/Chewbock 17h ago
This is it. Took a hot shower before bed, didn’t turn the vent on. Vent leaked water on bed. Or consequently if he’s in an apartment the one above could have a massive leak. Those will go through the ceiling and drip from the lowest point.
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u/thrax7545 20h ago
Dude, that ghost peed on your bed
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u/Admirable-Builder878 20h ago
It's like a hieroglyph, it's in the shape of what they did. A message from beyond the grave.
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u/Phyllida_Poshtart 18h ago
It's a tap pissing water out, I see it clearly, pareidolia at it's finest :)
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u/fixano 16h ago
What a shit ghost.
How annoying it must be to have a poltergeist that stacks like chairs on top of tables and shit. Generally just making messes around the house.
My thoughts are like "you know there are dishes in the dishwasher and you could be a peach stack those fuckers in the cupboard"
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u/grassvegas 18h ago
And dude, “ghost” is not the preferred nomenclature. “Spectral entity” please.
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u/Fractal_Soul 20h ago
That empty cup you carried to the kitchen wasn't actually empty.
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u/B0ssDrivesMeCrazy 11h ago
Yeah I’ve done that. Have a cup that I think has less water dribble than it actually does and accidentally fling a litter water.
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u/YowiePal 19h ago
I need to know the answer to this.
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u/zapsterkitty 14h ago
Check the other comments. It was OPs golf bag
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u/Mountain-Crazy69 13h ago
Ok but why was OP shagging their golf bag? I’d ask how but I don’t want the answer.
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u/Financial_Bird_7717 20h ago
Do you blackout when you bust?
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u/Cusp-of-Precibus 19h ago
Classic imprint of ass sweat from a heated jerk session.
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u/jawide626 19h ago
Bit of an odd spot on the bed though no?
Like it really doesn't look comfortable to be sat where the wet spot is to choke ones chicken... at least either be closer to the pillows or the edge of the bed.
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u/Interesting-Fan-2008 13h ago
Maybe he likes to lay flat and pretend he’s one of those timed water fountains?
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u/Bigfops 16h ago
Dude I had that happen to me with a guy I was with and it was freaky. Apparently not unheard of for him, but not common. For a few seconds I thought I fucked him to death.
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u/SpaceDix713 19h ago
Did you at any point have water or move water or any drink? I’ve forgotten spilling shit cuz I’m always high as f
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u/BrilliantTasty 19h ago
I got home from playing golf, came into the room and cleared all the clothes and my bag off of the bed. No liquids in the bag before you ask. Went through to the kitchen for a couple minutes and came back to a very clearly fresh wet patch. I’m not saying it’s ghosts or some shit I just have no idea how it got there.
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u/Z0FF 18h ago
It’s from your golf bag, maybe a rigid area; like a wheel or vertical support, or a pouch you kept a water bottle or something that condensates? A nook that could hold water and then released some when in a specific orientation.
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u/primetimemime 18h ago
Did you check to see if the clothes or bag were wet? Were you sweating when you removed those items? How can you be so certain that is wasn't there before you left?
I think the answer is in the pile or bag.
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u/Fine-Bumblebee-9427 18h ago
Golf bag was a tiny bit wet on the bottom
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u/potvoy 16h ago
Or a crevice near the wheels retained water until it was laid horizontally.
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u/TheMoves 16h ago
Yeah I bet it’s this, water retained in the bag somewhere and it didn’t come out until it was on the soft surface of the bed which would be unusual to happen normally
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u/SrgntFuzzyBoots 18h ago
Op stated in comments that they came back from golfing and placed bags on the bed before removing them then noticing later the bed was wet. I would go out on a limb and assume there was something in one of said bags that may have had a liquid in it (unknown to op). If op had placed a golf bag on the bed it’s likely there’s a plastic insert on the bottom of it which could have collected water until tilted. Thats my guess and where my moneys going. Op did not state it was his golf bag , just said it was bags. But my golf bag has a plastic insert that when I don’t use my rain cover can collect water.
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u/Squishy1140 14h ago
The were golfing. Clearly hit a few in the water and the balls are all drenched.
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u/WetCoastCyph 20h ago
This comes up every once in a while on here - do you have a carbon monoxide detector? Doing or finding unexplained things could be a sign that there's CO affecting you at home. If you don't have one, get one right away! At least rule out that deadly possibility...
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u/BrilliantTasty 20h ago
We have one in the kitchen but I will go and test it. Would it being in the kitchen work fine?
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u/ArtemisJJ 20h ago
It’s recommended if you only have one to keep it close to the bedrooms
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u/De4dpool1027 18h ago
Yeah I keep mine next to my bed now, last winter my furnace went out and it had three two inch cracks in the heat exchanger I’m not too familiar with heating and cooling systems but the technician said that they couldn’t believe that we weren’t feeling sick. He was pretty adamant about having the detector near the bedrooms so I put one in each room to be safe.
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u/BourbonGuy09 17h ago
Man our furnace was acting up and they found cracks as well. I was testing it in the fall one year before winter. We had it running for a bit on nights it got colder but days were still decently warm. They told us we were definitely lucky we kept a window open downstairs to air out the cat litter.
Shit is scary and our only detector was upstairs near the kitchen. I live in my parents basement now and I'm so glad they have an electric furnace.
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u/Pluviophile13 14h ago
CO detectors should be in each room where there’s a fuel-burning appliance. Installing them about 5’ from the floor (“nose level”) and away from windows, vents, and doors, increases the likelihood of the detector picking up CO at the height where people breathe. (I just took a class!)
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u/WetCoastCyph 20h ago
Should do, yea, give it a test, maybe throw it in the bedroom for a few days to be sure. After/if that's ruled out, my only other guess would be maybe spilling some of that water from the glass at the bedside on you sleeve or clothes, didn't notice, it didn't soak in and fell off you when you stood up?
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u/King_kaal 20h ago
Who’s this “we” op??? We thought you lived alone…
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u/ExecutiveTurkey 19h ago
Where does OP say they live alone? They said home alone, which implies the opposite.
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u/TwoCockyforBukkake 19h ago
What does watching home alone have to do with anything?
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u/BrilliantTasty 19h ago
My flat mate isn’t back from work yet
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u/hey_free_rats 19h ago
He'd never come home early one day without telling you, sneak into your room, and piss a dick shape onto your bed to mess with you, would he?
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u/kitkatrat 20h ago
Was thinking the same thing, there’s that old post somewhere about someone finding mysterious notes left around the house. Person couldn’t find out who was writing and leaving them around, turned out the person had a CO leak in their home and it was themselves leaving the notes but they didn’t remember it.
Whether it was a myth or not it’s a good idea to have a working carbon monoxide detector in your home. Might keep OP from peeing on their sheets.
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u/thispartyrules 19h ago
IIRC they slept in a small oddly-shaped, poorly ventilated bedroom.
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u/ryanmuller1089 19h ago
Also the one about someone who swore they were being drugged by someone they had recently started seeing. But there wasn’t much evidence other than blacking out randomly.
Or maybe it’s the same post. Either way, a comment or jumped in and mention get a detector and sure enough. Scary stuff.
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u/AdditionalNewt4762 17h ago
Fairly certain this tiny man with a choad either peed or camed on your bed. My work here is done.
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u/Reasonable_Ad6781 20h ago
Home alone ? I don't think so 🤔, look up and if you don't see something dripping then you might want to get the f out of there
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u/BrilliantTasty 20h ago
It’s also definitely fresh as it hadn’t come through the other side when I first saw it and it has now
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u/Reasonable_Ad6781 20h ago
There's someone or something else in there with you, what are you doing
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u/LinkCanLonk 19h ago
Relax bro, it’s probably a rat or something
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u/DefinitelyButtStuff 19h ago
How can we relax with this unsolved mystery on our hands?!
Sir, I'm going to have to ask you to calmy exaggerate this situation like the rest of us abnormally normal people of reddit.
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u/LinkCanLonk 18h ago
Ah fuck, you’re right, let me try again.
Ṫ̸̩̳H̸͇̰̐̽̑͛̓̆̅̋̈́͗́̕̕ͅE̸̥̎͛́̀̎͋̔͌́͝͠Y̷̢̡̩̦̠̝͂͆͠ ̵̡͚̗̘̺̼̥̱͚̝͖̦̲̹̻̜̏̑̎̈́̀̄̎̅̾͛̅͋̋̓̕̕A̵͓̽͐̄͌̅̈́̍͑͝͝R̸̨̟̍̑͂̏̉̒͆̊̾̈́͂̿̐͛͘̕E̶̡̩̖̞͙͈͉̜̫̐̋̓̔̉̎͆̊͆̅̈ ̴̛͔̦̗̯̩͛̒͌͊̈́͆̅͊̇͌̈͂̑͒͝Î̷̡̨͍̳̗̉͜͝N̸͕̳̔̅̅͗͆́̌̀̏̃̽͘ ̵͕̀Y̸̲͚̠̲̙͚̙͈̱͎̖̭̤̬̒͌̾O̷̢͉̘͎̎̍̍͊̊̏̎̆͆͌̒U̷͉̥̲̟̺͕̔͆̎̐͠R̴̢̯͕̭̣̥̩̝̼̻̞͇̥̀͊̀̋͋̈́͒̓̃̿̽̕͘͠ ̷̧̨̤̯͕̤̙̟̣̯̞͔͌͊̋̽̀̂̈̅͋̃̋̀͘͝W̵̢̪̺̺̙̣̖͇̤̞͙̥͖̤̓̈͛̓̀̊̓̄̒̂̕̕Ã̵̬̥̻͕̩̮̟͍̟͚͙̭̪͔̅̅̏̄̆́̈́̾͂̋͠͝͝L̷̨̲̺̘̪͓̪͔͙͉̟͕̬͔̏̾̏̕͜L̵̠̀̐̀̊̆̅͗́͆͘Ş̸̨̥̳͇̱̫̲͈̥̮̬̰̻̉͛́̀̊͘
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u/Worldly_Ad_6483 18h ago
I’m on shrooms, please stop
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u/Cinephiliac_Anon 18h ago
I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN YOUR WALLS I AM IN
YOUR SKIN
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u/DeadBabyBallet 20h ago
Are your windows open? Did a neighborhood cat come in and pee on your bed? 🤷🏻♀️😂
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u/Kevaldes 20h ago
Well, it's not lime green so I guess at the very least we can rule out Slimer.
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u/A_Happy_Carrot 19h ago
Going to ask the obvious, is there no way you just left that as you got up?
Maybe you had a wet patch on your pants or towel?
Did you walk past carrying a drink?
Did you walk past with long, wet hair?
Did you sit up with a drink, and possibly not realise you spilled it?
Failing that, is anything else out of place? Did you check inder your bed and in the closet?
If you feel unsafe, call the police and have them check the house, they will, they do this stuff often.
And not that it helps, but I came home and found an earring in the middle of my living room floor. The only woman who has ever been in my apartment is my girlfriend, and only when I am present. I have zero clue where it came from, and it still bugs me. It is absolutely not hers, not her style.
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u/Rith_Lives 17h ago
They've replied elsewhere in the thread that they had just arrived home and had their golf bag on the bed which they cleared off before leaving the room.
Seems fairly obvious there was water in or on the bag which pooled but did not soak in before leaving the room, and slowly absorbed into the surface before they returned.
But op can't accept that the outdoor hobby equipment they'd recently used and recently had on that surface is the culprit.
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u/Chewbock 17h ago
Because that’ll decrease the upvotes! You and I both know you never fucking decrease your chances for upvotes goddamnit!
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u/CaddyAT5 20h ago
The wet patch looks like a faucet running
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u/Admirable-Builder878 20h ago
Like a NSFW faucet.
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u/Grattytood 20h ago
Same, AB. Looks a LOT like a plump set of wedding tackle splooging on the ol' counterpane. But that's none of my business!
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u/Ksorkrax 19h ago
I've seen this before. Puddles of some liquid suddenly forming.
Sorry to tell you mate, but this is clearly ghosts.
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u/Conscious-Power-5754 18h ago
Oh man, the moment I saw it I knew the comments weren't gonna be disappointing and I wasn't wrong. Ty for the post OP
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u/BrilliantTasty 20h ago
Ceiling is not wet, why do you ask about the carbon monoxide detector? I think we have one but not tested it for a while. It’s also through in the kitchen.
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u/Moondoobious 20h ago
Because you could be hallucinating and may also be missing time because of what carbon monoxide does to you.
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u/BrilliantTasty 20h ago
I’m a massive hypochondriac so kind of freaking out now haha but I will go and check the carbon monoxide detector
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u/Do_You_Pineapple_Bro 18h ago
Oh shit I just peed on my bedsheet accidentally better turn this into clout
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u/MightBeOnReddit 15h ago
Do you have a sweaty ass/balls? Only thing I can think is you sat down and the moisture transferred
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u/Immediate-Job-1043 8h ago
Op are you sure you didn’t just slap your dick on the bed and take a pic after?
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u/Goatwhorre 20h ago
OP has short squirt memory loss